I’m from a conservative culture but moved abroad a decade ago. My parents recently learned that my partner has ADHD, and because awareness of neurodiversity is still limited in my home country, they have concerns based on media portrayals of challenging behaviors in children with ADHD. They worry about potential aggression and the possibility that our future children might be born neurodivergent. I understand why they feel this way, as they have no background knowledge of ADHD and don’t speak English, which makes it harder for me to share reliable resources with them.
However, what they don’t know is that I myself am autistic, something I was only diagnosed with at 31. My sister knows, but I’ve never told my parents. This makes their worries about ADHD feel somewhat ironic—especially since autism can also be inherited, and there is already a diagnosed autistic cousin in the family. When my father expressed concern about inheritance to our kids a few months ago, I tried to shift the focus by pointing out that my depression is also something to consider. They would never demand that I break up with my partner over this, but I still feel uneasy that they hold these worries about ADHD without understanding the bigger picture, including my own neurodivergence.
Hope this makes sense. I just needed somewhere to vent and advice on if I should tell my parents about my neurodivergence. I don't mind anybody else knowing about it, but I'm afraid my parents would ignore or deny it.