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How do I tell my family

Lub2024

Hi all, (those who can be bothered to read anyways)

ive very recently been diagnosed as autistic, my parents, who i dont live with and havent for years, seem to not accept the diagnosis 

my parents and wider family dont understand or seem to want to acknowledge that im autistic.

it answers a lot of the questions i have had regarding how i care about people or understand why people seem to care about other peoples problems, to put it bluntly

has anyone had any experience with this  or has any advice to “politely” tell your family that there are some things that just dont bother you, or things about people like there problems that you just dont really care about or understand?

thanks

Parents

  • My mom has never accepted the idea of me being autistic, I'm not diagnosed but I shared with her once a therapist suggested that to me. Also my teachers at school told her that thing. She has a vision of autistic child in tantrum, she has the vision of autistic person calculating like a calculator. I know I will not change it. In fact I had meltdowns as a kid and teenager but she seemed to just ignore it as my bad moods or bad behaviour. I decided I'm gonna explore this topic without involving her at all. She herself displays autistic traits however they affect her much less than me so she can't understand me and my problems. It's sad but sometimes the diagnosis really is just for us to know, not necessarily for our relatives to give them explanations. I just received referral but I don't know how it goes further 

  • in reply to Alien0n3arth

    Yea i know especially with the older generation when everything that was either dyslexic = stupid, autistic/ adhd naughty or odd child. They just cant grasp the change…

    i had a referral via nhs, nhs mental health dept agreed that there should be a assessment, got reffered back to gp for them to refer me privately via right to choose, which autism and adhd fall in to. Basically if nhs has a long waiting list (im not sure the amount of time) you can ask to be referred privately but nhs pick up the bill. 

  • in reply to Lub2024

    I'm not living in UK I will have to discuss it with my therapist. But I'm so happy I finally found one that understands me and my problems instead of gaslight or stupid comments. My mom and sister both told me I was very weird kid. But i wouldn't use their help for an assessment 

Reply Children
  • in reply to Lub2024

    No need to say sorry, all good. My mom is a very specific case, she reads something in the internet and then she considers herself a specialist because she red and she knows. And then she gives herself right to diagnose people around. I told her it’s wrong but she is stubborn so I just decided to not talk about it. If it’s already 4th professional saying it’s autism, but she says NO! They are stupid, I know better! Then I have no words. She said her husband has borderline. I only asked her who told them it’s borderline, and she said she discovered it herself because she red so she knows. Wow! 

  • in reply to Alien0n3arth

    Sorry for the assumption, i was toying with the idea of whether it was worth the referral, but wanted it just to clarify my thoughts with myself.