Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi all, my first post so bear with me! :)
I was diagnosed in April this year at 38. It didn’t really come as a shock to me or my family. I was pleased in a way because I know the reason I am the way I am, and now I try to embrace my true self because I feel I’ve masked enough during my life.
I’ve struggled today though. I told a “trusted” colleague at work and was met with an attitude that has made me wish I hadn’t. They questioned whether I was actually medically diagnosed (I am but it shouldn’t matter?) they then said that the differences I have and struggle with are “things everyone deals with lumped under the name of autism”. I was gobsmacked by this comment.
I feel completely foolish that I trusted this person when usually I’m extremely private. Although I am aware that it’s their problem and not mine. I just wished I’d kept quiet. I thought this person would be supportive - how wrong I was.
No one else is aware of my autism at work and I’ve been reluctant to tell others because it doesn’t affect my work and I believe peoples attitudes will change around me. I’ve occasionally heard people use the terms “spectrum” and “autistic” as a means to insult others. This offends me and scares me into not saying anything.
I realise I’m lucky that I have my immediate family’s support, not everyone has that and I appreciate it. I just wonder if anyone else has struggled with telling friends, colleagues etc? How did you deal with ignorant comments?
I have worries at work like you. I've not told anyone at work. But they laugh at the guy in the office who they think is autistic and laugh at the lady there who they think is 'weird' who I think is autistic. This goes for my line manager as well.
They also have made comments about how "everyone is wanting to get diagnosed with autism" for financial reasons.
I meanwhile am mortified and failing at my own masking.
It makes me despair of people in general.
This is so similar to my experiences, and I’m sorry you’re going through it as well. It’s just so disappointing isn’t it. I also am not comfortable telling management. if I ever hear people using outdated language or offensive terms I’m pretty quick to challenge them and argue my point. But when it comes to my own autism I clam up. Like I want to shrink away so as not give the game away I wish I had advice to give I really do.