mainstream school or special school !

Hiya Adeen! 

My son is 5 and has just finished reception, he has autism (and autism only currently), he is non verbal and in a SEN provision of the local mainstream school. During the path of diagnosis, I asked the paediatrician whether he should be in mainstream or a special needs schools and she replied "Mainstream, he needs a chance so we can see what he can do".  Which I now realise, yes he absolutely did. 

1. Mainstream: 

As my daughter already attended, I absolutely knew the school did well with SEN children in her year. The year before my son was due to start I spoke to SENCO and said looks heres the situation, "no ehcp, no diagnosis but clearly something is going on" over the years she had met my boy at varies school events. She in no doubt said she would take him mainstream but also our school has a bid for a SEN provision to be built on site. Our school got the provision and my son was first to be accepted into it. My son gets to have access to: 

School assembly, before and after school club, reading diary and reading book being brought home, access to classes with the mainstream children that he could manage, gets to attend with his sister and loves milling about with her friends, we do mufti days, sports days (he can now throw a ball and us a bat), parents evening, school trips, world book day. As the SEN children mix with the mainstream, they are very good at including them in playground fun. 

The SEN provision itself, has a soft play room, a calming room, a whole kitchen and dining table,(you can order the school dinner or do a packed lunch, or even ask the staff to do something specific like mash food up, or make something) 2 playgrounds of there own, lots of fun outdoor play equipment. My son is an outside child, he loves the rain and being outside in general and although they do specific lessons, during free play he's allowed to be outside which he loves. So after his first year, he's attempting to talk more, he's happy, he's stimulated, attempting to write with the proper grip, he's taking turns, he's trying more things like food and drinks, he's potty trained, he's able to do things like butter his own toast, mix cake batter, crack an egg.- all skills they do at school. He still does not follow instructions but I feel like he's doing better with single words instructions.

I feel like his nursery years were tragic, he was miserable and hated going, but this year has been amazing to bring him out if his shell and stop crying all the time. The SENCO said she actually cannot believe it's the same child as the one she went to see at nursery. I feel like I've learnt alot about him, so now I've adapted in the way I do things with him.

The school will give me resources they use at school to use at home, access to.the websites they use, books, phonics cards, they provide photos of his day and I get a full run down of how his day has been and what he's been up to. If I ask for anything to help support, they will do it. I always ask, what can I do to support him and they will do it. All the staff are fully SEN trained. I will also say, my friends non verbal son is in the mainstream reception class of this school, in a class of 30. For the majority he has coped and done well but has spent most if his time outside the classroom.

So far the only issues I have encountered is with one particular member of staff. She is now no longer there so no more issue.

In my area, we only have 2 special needs schools,  a good one and a not so good one. My best friends little boy has just finished at the not so good one, here's what she had to say:

Unfortunately it was not a good experience at all. But due to the behaviour aspect of my son, we had no choice other than a special needs school. He has other medical needs too, which require medication. My son has basically has zero learning in the last 6 years, no effort at all in getting him to learn to read, write or communicate. No formal education at all.There has been no relationship between us and the school, no parent invites to sports day or parents evenings. Staff not trained, it's just a job, no updates about his day or what he has been doing, staff won't let me know anything about behaviours or medical stuff. The school constantly nit picks about the small stuff, like if his nails haven't been cut but wont admit when they make mistakes. Recently they have been constantly complaining about my sons behaviour, he's been kicked off transport twice in the last year. My friend looked into for me as the stress was so immense and  found out the school have been lying about him having a 1:1. In our county, no one has 1:1 as there is just not enough money. The school have telling me for years he has a 1:1, they finally admitted he doesn't when my friend queried his "behaviours which shouldn't have occurred if he has a 1:1".  I feel like the special schools should have a medical team onsite, more than once they got his medications wrong, never admitted or told me until months later. (If I had got his medication this wrong at home, he would have been taken away). Knowing what I no now I would have tried to get him into the other school from the beginning. The school have just been there to babysit this whole time.

As a parent it is hard, I had the council and my sons nursery breathing down my neck constantly calling me about special needs schools. You need to view schools and ask all the questions. My friend had a senco that promised the world and failed to deliver. But also being a parent is admitting when your child needs more and probably won't manage in mainstream. I've seen parents just leave SEN kids in our school when they need more support.. its not fair on the children. 

Good luck with your choice! 

ParentingAutism said:

It all depends of your child's needs.

I would second this though - we need to understand their level of impact from autistic traits to be able to focus on the right solutions for them.

A big part of this will be what level of integration is anticipated when they come out the other end of the school system.

For example for someone with lower needs, a mainstream school may be a good option and allow them to develop ways to integrate with neurotypicals and pick up the social skills to allow them to more seamlessly integrate into society and have a "normal" life, job, relationship etc.

If they go to a special school then they will be less well prepared for the transition into adulthood and the adult world, will probably be more accustomed to high maintenance support and lack the skills to socialise with neurotypicals due to lack of practice.

Special schools are absolutely the right choice for someone with a high support need but otherwise I would suggest mainstream.

If my own childhood among the savages of the NT school tracking system was any indication - Unless the idea of accommodation is now truly a real thing, and is consistently and compassionately practiced,  without the constant pressure for the ND child to "comply!", "Adjust" and "get used to it!" - there is no point of exposing them to the trauma. Special schools are there for your child, for people who have some  support needs NT schools just will not or cannot supply.

If you love them, give them over to the tutelage of those who will also love them for who they are and teach them with the tools most appropriate for them. 

Hi Adeen

I totally relate to your situation - my daughter spent a couple of years in a mainstream setting before moving to a special school, and I wrestled with the decision beforehand. For my daughter, who has some learning difficulties alongside her autism, a special school is 100% the right place for her, but it’s a very individual decision that will be influenced by the needs and abilities of your child.

1. Mainstream

- Benefits of mainstream: for my daughter, I’m afraid there really weren’t any. I told myself that in a mainstream school she would have the option of doing traditional exams, GCSEs etc, and that maybe interacting with the NT kids would help teach her social skills … however in retrospect I should have known better. I’m autistic myself and attended mainstream throughout my education, and it never taught me social skills as I was very alone in the flock of NT kids. I also got stellar grades and got all the qualifications my parents could hope for, but it’s done nothing for me as an autistic adult, as job interviews require more than good grades. For my daughter, it quickly became apparent that there was no possibility of her mixing with the NT kids and socialising or taking traditional exams - the school didn’t want her disrupting a class, so they separated her and 7 other kids with additional needs, and kept them in an outbuilding that wasn’t big enough for the purpose, with no room for desks or chairs and no hope of any kind of education.

- How did mainstream support her academically and socially? Again I’m afraid they didn’t. Don’t get me wrong, they did their best, but even though my daughter had an EHCP, they couldn’t access enough funding to meet her needs. She needed 1:1 time to learn academically and socially, but they didn’t have the staff or experience to provide that, so she learnt nothing while she was there. All they could do was try and keep her safe.

- Challenges: The ‘classroom’ for the additional needs class was a tiny outbuilding, so she felt confined and constantly tried to escape - often successfully, which put her in danger. The school had about 1000 kids, so getting her into school and home again involved weaving through hundreds of other kids and parents, which was so stressful for her. Non-uniform days for charity fundraising happened frequently, which freaked her out as she couldn’t understand why suddenly all the other kids were wearing a riot of different colours. As the setting made her very anxious, her behaviour got worse, and I was hearing nearly every day that she’d been screaming or hitting or biting or trying to eat non-food items, and she was correspondingly unhappy at home. And as I mentioned before, the school didn’t have the funds, resources, training or experience to cope with her, much less teach her anything. These challenges were only addressed in the sense that the school crossed their fingers and hoped that a space would become available for her at a special school. Although they did let her leave 10 minutes early at the end of the day, so we could avoid the worst of the crowds.

2. Special schools

- specialised approaches: after a lengthy and awful battle with the local authority, my daughter now attends a fantastic special school for children with autism and moderate learning difficulties. I’m sure I’m not going to do justice to their range of specialised approaches, but they include: daily 1:1 lessons, 'bucket time’ working on attention and listening, only 4 children in the class so a much higher level of supervision, extra 1:1 PE lessons to work on her gross motor skills, they have their own speech therapist, occupational therapist, and play therapist, trips into the community to learn life skills (bearing in mind I would never have trusted the mainstream school to take her offsite), PECs communication, visual schedules, and every member of staff has training and experience in teaching kids with autism and additional needs.

- did attending a special school enhance your child’s educational experience: that’s an emphatic yes. She’s only been at the special school for two terms, but in that time she’s made astonishing progress academically, more than I believed possible. I put this down to the teacher being able to communicate with her in a calm quiet environment and reach her on her level, using strategies that work for her as an autistic girl with learning difficulties, and doing this 1:1 every day. At the mainstream school, my daughter made zero progress in her education, and I had no hope of this changing. She’s also really happy at the special school - all her anxiety behaviours just disappeared, as she’s so settled, comfortable and safe there, which in turn makes it easier for her to focus on learning.

- drawbacks of the special school: they don’t do GCSEs, or any formal qualifications. This worried me a few years ago when I was first considering a special school, but in my daughter’s case I now realise that was never going to be an option for her anyway - a mainstream pathway would have left her less educated than she has the opportunity to become now.  Another more immediately pressing one is that her classmates are autistic boys, who are prone to noisy meltdowns, and she is noise sensitive so this upsets her. The staff are good at reassuring her, and she’s gotten more used to it over time, but it is something she has to cope with which might not have been as much of an issue amongst NT kids. Although she’s currently very young, in the back of my mind I do worry about the safety implications of her being in that class of boys in 8 years time when they’re all big tall hulking teenagers (while she’s naturally tiny and likely to always be petite), but that’s a long way off and for the moment I have to trust that the school knows how to manage that situation. I know they do move classes around and choose who’s in each class based on other factors besides age, so presumably they keep the small girls away from the big boys where possible at that age, especially when there are violent meltdowns and severe learning difficulties to consider.

If the goal is an environment where my child can thrive, feel secure and be understood, 100% we have found it for my daughter at the special school, and she had none of that at the mainstream school. I also strongly feel that she has a much better chance of a meaningful education at the special school, because they have the resources and experience to reach her at her level.

I know my experience won’t be the same for everyone, particularly because my daughter’s level of learning difficulties meant that really only a special school could help her, but I hope this is in some way useful as the perspective of someone who has experienced both settings.

Hi Adeen 

I will be watching this thread carefully as the information you seek I might possibly seek for my youngest son. My son is going into year 5 after the summer break and the older he gets the more concerned I am. He was fine at school until the day he became a year 4 and it was like a switch had flipped, he has struggled on and off for the entire year. Academically he is above the schools expectations but as we all know it’s everything else in that environment that causes the challenges of daily life for them. My son has regular therapy sessions privately and she has told me that she doesn’t expect he will need to be outside of a mainstream setting. It’s a real tough one for me because on one hand being exposed to the typical population at a mainstream is preparing you for the reality of later life, this also in my opinion increases the chances of being bullied and singled out for being different. On the other hand at a school outside mainstream they get the tailored education and the opportunity to express themselves more but I guess are in a bubble. Once that bubble is gone they are in the real world. I feel at the moment my son should be in a mainstream school but I have heard from my friends wife who is a teacher of how things can get challenging in a secondary environment. 

Not sure how old your child is Adeen but primary has been great for my child. I plan on reviewing the situation once he has done some time in secondary education and if he’s not settling or refusing to attend then I would look at alternatives. 

I am on the spectrum myself and have only realised this since the discovery of my child’s neurodiversity. Looking back my school life was tough to say the least but I got through it by masking. Had a lot of jobs as an adult but always been a hard worker. Somehow ended up being self employed and working alone (it’s like this job found me somehow). What I’m trying to say is in my case I’ve always struggled but subconsciously found a way around things. 

I hope you get enough information to be able to help you make a decision. 

I wish you luck 

Hi, this is my own personal views of the both of these: 

Mainstream: 

1. My daughter was able to socialise with lots of people. She has learning the same as others her year.

2. They supported my daughter by reducing her timetable and letting her leave class when overwhelmed. She had a go-to person and place when needed.

3. The challenges we had was she was not diagnosed so did not have an EHCP so there was only so much school could do. She had meltdowns daily at school. She was separated from others. Due to the overwhelming environment of mainstream school she did not cope and kept being excluded and kicked out of them. It almost cost her her life in all honesty. 

Special School: 

1. The school used a range of different communication strategies, makaton, pecs, visuals. She was in a class with max 4 other students who are all staffed 1:1 or 2:1. Staff got to know her well, her likes, dislikes and her needs. Her timetable was individualised to her needs and likes. School bought foods and drinks that she liked. Because everyone is staffed 1:1 or 2:1 she has staff with her all day so I knew she was safe and supported and any behaviour challenges that arises were managed a lot easier that in mainstream. They allowed structured times to socialise, learn and spend time with other students, whilst supported where needed.  

2. Teachers taught her the way she would learn and understand. She was not learning at a level where other children her age would be but work always challenged her. She was taught what she needed to learn. She did Maths and English and the rest were more "relaxed" e.g. PSHE, Social Skills, Communication Skills, SALT, OT, Sensory, Cooking, Sports. Overall, she learnt more here than she did at Mainstream. 

3. Her special school was an autism specialist school with 20 students. She would share a class with students aged between 12-19, all at different levels. Most of them experienced times of distress and extremely challenging behaviours, which disrupted her (she also displayed behaviours disrupting others). Overall, this school was best for her and she did not want to miss a day. She now wants to work there which she has applied for. 

It all depends of your child's needs. Academically she was very bright but needed support to stay engaged and do the work. Socially she struggled but with her staffs help she formed friendships. Behaviourally, she needed substantial support to stay safe. Her communication skills were limited when she started and was using makaton, pecs, visuals, AAC device but over the 3 years she was there, she no longer needs them. This school was best for her in my opinion.