Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi, newbie here!
I have been lurking on online autism communities like Reddit's autism subreddits and elsewhere. I have been given the diagnosis of autism 3 times by 3 different psychologists. However, I don't relate to the majority of autistic experiences ( at least, those discussed online). There is a very strong emphasis on sensory issues- I was a very hypersensitive child, but as an adult, I'm *hypo*sensitive to sound and a lot of other stimuli. I'm quite sensory seeking too- I'm always running my hand over surfaces and touching things, so the hallmark autistic experiences of overstimulation and hypersensitivity are quite alien to me, at least as an adult. ( Of course, I'm not saying these experiences aren't valid! They absolutely are!)
Conversely, I don't see much discussion about the autistic traits that I experience to a significant degree- the need for things to be very predictable and always the same, especially in work situations (which has made most jobs a very bad fit for me- I need to do repetitive tasks that seldom change), difficulty with tasks that aren't part of my regular routine, and getting meltdowns when unexpected tasks arise.
It does make me feel kind of lonely when my manifestation of autism isn't all that common ( at least as far as I can see) and I can't find all that many people who experience what I experience. It's like I don't fit in neurotypical world or the autistic world. Am I just some kind of mutant?
Those are things I've seen talked about though, I think you just haven't come across them.
I personally struggle very little with hyposensitivity and hypersensitivity, I don't think all autistics have them and if I'm not mistaken, they are not needed for diagnosis.
And again, I don't personally struggle much with the wanting predictability but I've heard about it a lot. It's sometimes talked about alongside wanting no changes.
Exactly, there are hyper and hyposensitivities. Mostly folks discuss hypersensitivities because they cause them pain/irritation or other bad feelings. I also experience that. But I’m hyposensitive to pain. Someone else may be hyposensitibe to light or sound. Or other things. The fact that you may not fit the stereotype, or most common experience does not make your experience invalid. But I understand your point. For me if I get overstimulated I just leave. Someone else may get a destructive meltdown. I had meltdowns as a teenager if some of my belongings were missing and I couldn’t find it. I found some other people who experience the same thing. I managed that to avoid the terrible meltdown as it was really exhausting and I felt terribly ashamed. Everyone is different. Everyone on the spectrum is also different.
Hi Newbie
I started a thread recently called 'the commonalities of autistic adults ' as I was trying to put together a list of the things we have all experienced, and was also trying to make more sense of the standard diagnosis criteria, plus adding in a couple more of my own. So I'm copying that list below:
Social communication examples:
- Replying to a question such as "How was your weekend?" with a lengthy monologue, then noticing that the other person's face has gone blank and they don't appear interested.
- Rehearsing what you are going to say in your head, or writing it down to help you remember.
- Hating phones / preferring to send emails
Social interaction examples:
- Feeling overwhelmed by strong emotions in yourself or others
- Being bullied, teased or made fun of, or feeling you have been misunderstood
- Not having your ideas listened to
Repetitive and restrictive behaviour examples:
- Feeling extremely stressed if you are in the middle of a task and are suddenly told you must do something else - now!
- Cannot "hot desk"
Sensory under or over sensitivity examples:
- Hearing sounds others don't notice, like the ticking of a clock or the hum of a machine
- Over sensitivity to heat or cold (may make you feel unwell or register as pain)
Highly focused interests or hobbies examples:
- Obsession about a hobby or topic; thinking about it when you should be doing something else
- When absorbed in your hobby, losing track of time or of physical needs (thirst, hunger, tiredness etc)
Extreme anxiety examples:
- Feeling highly anxious in a "normal" situation, such as a supermarket checkout queue.
- Gastro-intestinal issues
Meltdowns and shutdowns examples:
- Loss of emotional control, leading to anger or crying
- Loss of the ability to speak, function or even think properly
Learning differences examples:
- Difficulty in catching a ball / tying laces, clumsy (possibly gross motor skills dyspraxia)
- Hyperlexia (advanced reading skills) or dyslexia
Which ones apply to you?
What aspects do you feel arn't reflected? Autism is a whole raft of experiences and differences its why its called a syndrome, rather than say a disease where everybody has the same symptoms.
I often don't feel my experiences are reflected much either, I mostly put that down to being older than many posters and having no help or recognition until I was 50, I still don't have much in the way of help, only here really.
You don't say how old you are or where you live, I think age can make a huge difference and different countries and societies deal with autism very differently.
If I went along with what's "said" what I ought to do and not do, I'd be a totally different person, I wouldn't be the person who's been avidly watching local and mayoral elections, I wouldn't like or understand politics. I'd be good at maths and tech, which I'm terrible at. Rhink far to much focus is on what we ought not to do and not on we can do and certainly none on what the NT world could learn from us.