Published on 12, July, 2020
I was in a long term relationship and I made it clear from the start that I was seeking an autism diagnosis, and my partner was totally chill with that. But as soon as I was diagnosed he treated me differently. I tired to talk to him about how I face work place discrimination due to my disability, and that autistic people were less likely to be employed etc., but he wouldn't listen o me and didn't care. He even said "why would people hire autistic people if they won't even be good at their job?", which was really hurtful. I think the worst thing for him was just me being anxious whilst in public. I was really struggling because I was newly diagnosed and we were in a really busy part of London, and so I did start crying from stress. I think he just felt embarrassed by me.
A couple days later he broke up with me, citing that I am too emotional, needy, and dependent on him. When I asked him if it was specifically the autism, he didn't answer me, so I can assume that's a yes. It has been 2 months since then and I'm still devastated as to why he treated me like this. I am not sure how to move forward in my life or have a relationship again knowing that my partner could end up heavily disliking me because I'm autistic. It hurts to know that who I am is so terrible that my ex just felt out of love with me. Pls advise me. :)
I am so sorry to hear that you are going through this.
Sending virtual hugs.
It must be very painful to feel like you are not good enough because of your autism. I want to assure you that it's not true, you are good enough and there are many people who will love and accept you for who you are. It's important to remember that your ex-boyfriend's opinion of you does not define who you are. He's entitled to his own feelings, but that doesn't mean that his feelings are true or that it's right to treat you in such a way. You deserve so much better. You are a valuable person, and you deserve to be loved and accepted for who you are. I know it's hard to move on after a breakup, but it's important to try to focus on the positive things in your life. Surround yourself with people who love and support you. Do things that make you happy. And don't give up on love. There are many people out there who will love you for who you are.