Published on 12, July, 2020
So, I was wondering if anyone else feels this way?
We are encouraged, these days, to just be ourselves. But if you have done this and always found the real you is rejected how on earth are you meant to live in the world authentically?
Just ignore the negative responses and persist? Or, like most people in the world with a heart, do you then adjust your 'self' to be less divisive/offensive/turbulent, in order to find a way to fit? (Mask)
Just struggling to fit a star shaped personality through a round hole atm, and it's made me very depressed
I feel like a good way to explain it is, what would you do if nobody cared?
I would have probably given singing in public a go, or have tried improve comedy, or worn clothing I find in fancy dress shops mixed with fashionable items to juxtapose cultural expectations a bit.
But alas, as much as I could unmask and do these things, I know the judgement I would experience would be too agonising. So it's just easier to surpress those ideas and live a more introverted existence.
What would you do if nobody cared?
Do other people care? As much as you think that they do? Trying comedy is a good example. You could completely bomb at comedy and NT's will have forgotten by the next day. You will remember it ,but they will care very little.