Published on 12, July, 2020
I have a friend that I met online who has ASD. We are in different geographic locations (me = USA, him = UK), but we were messaging each other throughout the day, almost every day for the past 6 or 7 months. I know he has been stressed with his job and other people in his immediate world, lately. He warned me that he was considering deactivating his social media for a while because it was stressing him out, and said that he didn't want me to panic. It has been almost 4 weeks, so far, that he has been gone. I have no other way to communicate with him. I am very worried, as I want to be sure that he is ok. I, of course feel unclear about whether he wants to talk to me anymore, also. Could this be due to a "shutdown" or "burnout" on his part? From other things I read, that seems to make sense. I guess I just need some advice on what to DO. I know I should be patient, and I'm not mad at him or anything. I just want to understand what's happening and I need some guidance on how I can manage myself until/if he returns. Any insight would help at this point. Thank you in advance.
I hope it won't be too long, too. He has done this before, but he didn't explicitly tell me last time. Also is was for only 2 weeks, then. This time he DID tell me what he was planning to do, although he didn't say for how long. So, I think he's given me every reason to believe he WILL come back. I just have no idea when. At this point I am definitely trying my best not to worry, and to go on about my stuff. It is just hard when we were talking so frequently. I miss him and I hope he is getting the rest he needs. Thank you for your reply.
I've been in similar situations myself, so I understand how horrible it can be when one feels desperately worried and just wants to know the other person is okay.
Unfortunately, as others have said, all you can do is wait and see if your friend gets back in touch, whilst also trying to distract yourself from worrying. I know that this can be easier said than done.
Hopefully, it won't be too long until your friend gets back in touch with you to let you know that he's okay.
I hope you hear from him soon. If not, don't go blaming yourself.
Yeah you can get that way handling calls, you never have the luxury of knowing how things turn out, you got to make the most of the time you have..
Yeah. I will continue to wait. I hope he comes back. Thanks for your response.
Thanks. Trying to keep myself busy in other ways is exactly what I'm doing. Just hard not to wonder/worry about how he's doing. Thanks again for your response. I appreciate it.
If your only mode of contact has been shut down then unfortunately I'd say you have no option but to wait it out, unless you have mutual acquaintances that you could contact to find out. Sorry, not much help but a gravity issue really.
In as far as insight, it’s just a fact that the virtual and real don’t mix, when someone decides to shut the laptop-lid the virtual ceases. From the audience-perspective it can be a curse, that you never get to see beyond the veil, but that is also the blessing of the virtual-world. It’s beyond your control if you have no other connection but through that window, but it is a blessing for you too in a way, because the best conversations are the ones left unfinished. You’ve not done anything wrong, so try to interact with the qualities of your existing live, try to accept invitations from your remaining-circles to return to normal.. I hope this helps..