:'(

Autist, it also annoys me, and many other people, both with as/autism or not, when people don't wash cups out and leave them dirty. You're definitely not alone in that.

I know it's easier said than done, but just try to disengage from feelings of anger and just pity those who are careless enough to do that. I wouldn't throw the mug in future though! You don't want to damage the mug and deprive yourself of one because of someone's lack of respect!

Make sure you get any support that you need, and take it easy!!

thank you. everything got worse because someone who is not even my friend and wasn't my guest used my mug and didnt wash it up and got yucky brown crap at the bottom. I got very very mad and screamed and threw it. someone rang the door bell but I ignored it.

Don't give up, autist. Keep at life! Definitely don't lose your will to live over one individual alone: they don't deserve that status or that power, no matter who they are.

If I may be intrusive enough to ask, is this person someone you live with or someone in the "outside world"? Sometimes we're all vulnerable to what can only be described as "people poisoning", where an individual or certain individuals makes life very difficult.

Also, don't forget that certain people in life actively look to be offended; if you threw diamonds at them, they'd complain about the way you threw them! I don't know whether this applies in your particular situation, autist, but bear it in mind.

Life's too unusual and spectacular to let it trap you, so just forget about it all my friend, and just think about something that inspires you.

BTW Autist, if you are not already in touch with your local MHS you ought to see your GP to get referred, there may be something they can offer even if it's just offloading it to someone.

Don't give up.

I think the big problem is that mental health services do not often understand autism and therefore offer therapies that may work for neurotypicals but do not necessarily work for us.

We do need guidelines for living with autism. Unfortunately it doesn't seem to have that high a priority.

We know that, if you have difficulty communicating, you cannot gauge other people's reactions properly. You don't get the feedback NTs get. Therefore you have to gauge the impact of what you say or do in isolation - in your head.

That means you have to process the puzzle by working out the possibilities, which means working out a whole array of outcomes, realistic or otherwise, which lends itself to spiralling anxiety, and therefore acute anxiety and depression.

Also by not connecting properly we don't acquire over time the social conditioning that determines what is acceptable, so we may be more likely to say something that agitates or offends NTs.

So Autist's current difficulty is an inevitable outcome of being on the autistic spectrum. And we can all end up there.

Yet this has been known about for four decades now and we still don't have anything constructive to offer people caught up like this.

There are lots of people (who honestly have no real understanding of the problems) offering all kinds of indequately tested "cures".  But it doesn't seem worth any money working out how to help people cope with this lack of connectivity in their daily lives.

Hi Autist - so sorry to see from your post that you feel so very upset.  Your life is precious, as precious as anyone else's.  Do not ever think any differently.  I don't want to lose you, neither does Intense.  x

Take a deep breath and let it out slowly.  Switch to your logic rather than your emotions.  Emotional insult hits us hard, you will get through whichever incident or incidents have made you hit this low.

Just remember, no matter what, you are no less than any other person and you have just as much right to be on this planet.

Are there any AS/HFA social meet-ups or clubs in your area?  Perhaps if you mixed with others on the spectrum you would not worry so much about social faux pas.

You certainly don't need to die!  Focus on a special interest and maybe go to your GP to see if medication would be for you, or there are herbal remedies such as St John's Wort or 5HTP that can help.