Adult revealing autism at interviews?

Unfortunately you are caught between the devil and the deep blue sea!  If you do not declare you could be caught out later, perhaps with disciplinaries and performance issues.  If you do declare your autism, you stand a chance of being discriminated against but this would be difficult to prove.  They should make reasonable adjustments for you in the interview process to make things easier for you.  

If you get the job, I would look into applying for help from Access to Work, who may provide you with help with anything you need and could provide you with a support worker.  This help though, although paid for by the government varies between areas of the country depending on whether there is suitable help available in your area.  In the West Midlands I had a support worker provided by Autism West Midlands.  Access to Work do not always find suitable help unfortunately.  

But the emphasis should be on your workplace accommodating your disability if it is declared.  Not on you to put on an act in an attempt to be something you are not.

Oh no. They really are the most stressful experiences 

I cried in my last one

Yes, when it's far too late and completely unhelpful.

Pikl said:

I fall apart in interviews, laugh, fidget, get muddled, talk in circles. I'm very awkward

That's also my problem and I realise what I should have said to questions, an hour after the interview.

I fall apart in interviews, laugh, fidget, get muddled, talk in circles. I'm very awkward as I'm desperately trying to not be me and at the same time answer questions which are making my brain panic. If I added "I'm autistic" into that terrible mess, I'm certain that not only would it not help me, but also not help other autistic interviewees who may choose disclosure. 

Its only 2 years on from my diagnosis and having had time off work due to ill health do I now realise what masking means properly for me. 

A masking meltdown. ...I think that was me a few years ago. Good old alexithymia. I often wonder if some of alexithymia is often due to masking. We are so out of touch with what we really feel because we have tried so long to meet others' expectations.

Yes its one thing saying "I'm autistic" but we cannot expect people to fill those gaps. They might not know anything about it, not want to assume anything anyway, understand the stereotypes,  or know other autists but who are completely different to me. Basically it's a minefield and we can't expect people to mind read.

I think it depends on your track record and how you "come across" at interview. I think I could get away with saying it but others might not.

The over sharing drives me mad. My brain will be telling my mouth to shut up as I'm very happily telling all. Only when I walk away do I suddenly realise what's happened. Then it's the frustrating embarrassment. 

I have some unhealthy coping strategies also. It's very upsetting when you dont know why you need to do those things. Now it's a case of trying to find alternatives because you do finally know why.

I used to tell people I had Peter Pan syndrome to excuse my weirdness. Now I just smile and say I'm a bit weird, and hope others aren't laughing at me too much.

Yes, I think this is good advice for  telling them, no matter at what stage. I made that mistake the first time- I just blurted out 'I was diagnosed with autism yesterday' ... SHOCKED SILENCE followed... then awkward conversation... 

I think like you say a better way of doing it is to give concrete examples of what being autistic means for you in the work place eg. 'I am autistic. This means I do best with clear/direct instructions ... etc- basically everything you have said just now!! 

I wish I had done that but at the time, I didn't even know myself what it all meant and I just felt like a liar not saying something (yep probably typical autistic oversharing and too much honesty), so I just told them straight out with no explanation except that I myself had no idea what it meant... 

It's just an idea but could you go armed with "I'm autistic and this is what I have difficulty with...X, Y, Z. This means I get anxious etc. Therefore I need....". Also "I'm autistic and while I find x y and z difficult, my strengths are...."

Hi, Welcome!! This is quite a difficult. It really depends on who is interviewing you... Many people have a very poor understanding of autism- they may have a very stereotyped view or just not really know what it means etc. I know they shouldn't and aren't allowed to discriminate because you disclose but if they do, it would be very difficult to prove later that your disclosure is the reason they didn't pick you. So it is a risk. How much do you want the job? On the other hand, do you want to work for someone that discriminates against you because of your disclosure? I think it really depends on the job, but I think unless you want adjustments for the interview (though even there you don't necessarily have to specify the reason- you could just say 'sensitive to light' if that was an issue), it may be safer  to wait until you have an offer- that way they will already know you a little. If you then wanted to test their reaction, you could tell them once you have an offer and you could then also talk about possible adjustments- if they then react badly you can still pull out. Or you could wait until you start the job and they know you a bit better.... sometimes it is also useful to already slowly prepare them... for example, telling your manager "I do best with direct/clear instructions" or "I find spontaneous/unpredictable changes of plans difficult, can you try to give me plenty of notice etc?" or "oh don't worry if I have that expression on my face- it doesn't mean I am upset or unhappy, it's just my usual neutral, ok face'. This can help make interactions easier and can also make it easier for them to understand when you do disclose. Some people are also genuinely ignorant and just have no idea what being autistic means- if they just heard 'autism' at interview they might feel unsure, but if they already know you, that might make it easier for them to realise that autism=stereotype that they may have. 

I have been thinking about this a lot too... for my current job I was only in process of being diagnosed during interviews and when I accepted the offer... When I got the official diagnosis I told my manager and I got the "everyone is a little autistic" response. He didn't really know what to do with that information, but it wasn't unkind. I didn't ask for adjustments because I just wasn't really sure at time what I might need... 

I have recently been applying for PhDs and for some of those, there was a question about disability/learning difficulty on the application form... I read how they used that info and for one of them they said, the interviewers or people assessing the application will not be told, and the information will only be used in the selection if 2 candidates are rated equally- then they might pick to increase diversity. However on another application, I was going to put that I was autistic but then you could only put it as a disability and their definition of disability sounded so bad, I hesitated and changed it at the last moment- this was a different situation though. I already knew the supervisors and essentially already had the PhD place, but it just needed to go through the official channel... I actually have accepted that position now (though it's not clear yet if it will happen for reasons out of my control), and I am still debating, if and when I should tell them.... It's difficult- I don't want them to think I hid it from them. I also don't want them to feel like I am using it as an 'excuse' and since they already picked me the way I am, I am worried that might change how they see me... but it might still be good for them to know as I do face quite a few challenges and it might be better if we work together and if they know now rather than when issues arise. 

A friend of mine who has severe issues with eyesight- told me that her approach is usually this: She doesn't give details before interview, only states that she is sensitive to lights so that they can make that adjustment for the interview. They are legally not allowed to ask you about a disability/health condition during a job interview. Then once she has an offer (even if it is just verbal) she tells them and judges their reaction- if they hesitate or even try to pull back the offer, then she says that she doesn't want to work for those people anyways... if the reaction is positive then that's good. It's quite a bold take but she has had more experience with it. 

Not sure if any of this helps.... Whatever you decide, I wish you all the best for the interview!!! 

I know what you mean. Sorry to hear you burnt out. I have a saying when I am reaching my limit: "too many strands" and I tend to hand in my notice. About masking, looking back I didn't realise I was masking. I knew I was being a bit pretentious, but rode along on a wave of "quirky geekiness" and I think people used to find me alternative and perhaps entertaining in previous jobs, though it was a bit exhausting. Now that I'm in a senior position, I am expected to simply perform, without the "quirkiness". It's basically no fun for me, and in an industry which seems to breed brats (sorry to be blunt, I might be autistic you know) their entertainment is to load, fire and reload. Outing an autistic plays to the cliques. I have little interest in leading them, helping them to succeed or even working alongside them if that is the way they choose to get ahead. The brats seem to get married, have kids and move to suburbia, then they become as childish as their pre-school counterparts. I think I might be better at home, in a job with more serious people or where I work for myself. Thanks for your openness and insights!

Difficult situation.  Officially we are advised to tell the truth about our state of health and Autism.  But privately I have been ordered by employment advisors to lie, lie and lie.  Never mention health problems physical or mental, just lie that your health is perfect.  The downside is that if you're caught you face being dismissed for gross misconduct, I was.

.....well, therein lay my real dilemma....or should I call it demon!!!  I would mask my "crash and burns" too!!

I masked hard - and was REALLY good at it - and I have the stamina of an ox - and I had structured and curated a life for myself that could just about contain me and the world in some sort of tolerable harmony.

But you can imagine the type of chaos a masking meltdown-ridden dude can cause when he has absolutely no idea why he is behaving, acting and feeling the way he does.....whilst also remaining in virtual monopoly charge of himself.  Scary !

My coping strategies were not always healthy nor good ones for myself nor those around me...but I didn't know why I had them....I knew they were benign in motive, but the results were often malignant - most especially for me.

What the hell is wrong with me....am I mad, bad or sad.  Answer:- Autistic, with only a standard amount of mad, bad and sad sprinklings!

Sounds perfect for me! Time to start researching this! Thank you 

I think I masked that hard I didn't really have any coping strategies apart from crash and burn!

Thanks - It would be great if my painful reckoning and realisations can deliver some small measure of painless salvation to others.

I can look back at my past 50 years of coping strategies and behaviours now, and understand them for what they were.  At the time, they were just inexplicable things that I did and how I operated.  I did not understand why I did them myself - but somehow intuitively knew that they needed to be as they were.  It is absolutely fascinating to be honest - late diagnosis autism is like an endless revelation for me!

That's a great point, Number- I've done something similar myself. Acknowledging that you're a little bit weird gives you a bit more room to breathe rather than having to have the mask fully up all the time.