Well the event happened. Much like the Christmas one, I actually enjoyed it. Because I wasn't trying as hard. It was like i took a step back.
I sat on the end and was in an alcove. The music was too loud so I didn't try to listen to conversations all the time. I chipped in. I waited for people to speak to me. If conversations trailed off cos i didnt end it right i was less hypervigilent of this. If i hadnt said anything for ages i let it go. I enjoyed my food and concentrated on that. A bit of processing but mostly reassuring myself in my head with each bit "well that's ok". Basically I was really very quiet which is more my natural self AND WAS OK WITH THAT.
