Autism Shutdowns

you ok calm down what helps is when I go to the corner of my room and shut myself in it and close myself from the reality 

can't control my  reaction.
and sometimes it can cos a meltdown and the case of a meltdown, i may cry, scream, hit, and kick.

I've never had a meltdown as a result of a shutdown. I thought they are sort of mutually exclusive. 

My shutdown look like I literally disconnect from reality for a period of time and don't remember what happened, it's like a hole in my memory

Maybe you were being overloaded with stimuli and your body was trying to shutdown to avoid further exposure and becuase you didn't know you didn't change enironment and it led to meltdown?

Hello 

But how do I identify my trigger without it happening again 

Oh okay 

you need to identify trigger

It often happens it's a specific behaviour of anybody, or specific behaviour or one specific person, or noise, lights, smells

and than you need to say stop and go away before you get frozen in spot,

when you get to frozen point, you're helpless, if trigger is a person, a 3rd person can prevent your meltdown by taking trigger person away, but that's wishful thinking there will be someone who will notice that and act in time

you need to identify trigger

It often happens it's a specific behaviour of anybody, or specific behaviour or one specific person, or noise, lights, smells

and than you need to say stop and go away before you get frozen in spot,

when you get to frozen point, you're helpless, if trigger is a person, a 3rd person can prevent your meltdown by taking trigger person away, but that's wishful thinking there will be someone who will notice that and act in time

But how do I identify my trigger without it happening again 

Oh okay