That's all it has been
Born
Try to get an education admist a disfunctional environment
Not getting anywhere until you are 35
Abandoned
That's all it has been
Born
Try to get an education admist a disfunctional environment
Not getting anywhere until you are 35
Abandoned
I'd add, please don't commit crime if it makes someone else a victim. (teh world already has enough sad and angry people to be getting along with.
If you must kick against the traces, there are plenty of victimless crimes you can commit. And things that are not actually crimes yet still people do not want you to do, if you are a bit ASD like me..
exist, recover your strength and then start plotting world domination. Everyone want to do stuff right now but if your not in the right headspace you just dig yourself a bigger whole to climb out off, start with a small change. Like changing a few road signs and watch the neurotypicals breakdown in frustration . (This was intended as a joke, please don't commit crime unless your successful enough to get away with it. )
TARDISSTEVE I masked Autism for many years, or I thought I did. Then I was involved in an incident that led to a diagnosis of PTSD. Treatment didn't get me anywhere. Eventually, I saw three different people psychologist, a psychiatrist and a therapist. They all said, "Have you been assessed for Autism? The Therapist spent a lot of time looking at what it meant to be autistic and what impact it has had on my life of 52 years. She said I have Super Powers and Autism made me special.
Look at the things you enjoy and are interested in; these are the superpowers, the powers that make you a unique and amazing person.
Been there done that. They only STOP screaming at you when you refuse to accept it any longer..
(You walk away, you don't kill them)
IF you've been screamed at a lot as a kid, you get stuck in that pattern where you get used to it, and when you enter a more normal situation where people don't scream at you, it's alien!
It does sound like you are 35 and have a house to live in. That is a huge start.
Give yourself a bit of time to find yourself. There is PLENTY to get depressed about in modern life, but there are also plenty of nice things to enjoy, and things to create and grow yourself.
If you are living alone, and feeling lonely, as many of us Autists end up doing, Number 1 thing I'd do is get a cat (Or a dog if you are happy to take it for walks and exert more effort and expenditure into a dogs care than you'd put into a cat) You get a fresh start at forming loving relationships with an animal, and cats are darn good teachers.
If your life is screwed, and mine has been several times now, there are two ways you can exert control, I've found. And the one I select on any given day, depends on my state of mind.
1. If I am truly depressed, or angry, or just hating my life, and "I just can't win" and "I've had enough" I opt out of the struggle by sleeping. When I wake up I consider option 2, and if it isn't yet attractive I sleep some more until it is!
2. I try and "make things better". You'll swiftly find out, (if you don't know already) from this forum, that the normie world is extremely hard and deceptive, and those people who aren't actively pursuing a predator lifestyle are on the run from those who are, ad just waiting for "their chance" to get "on top". (even if it means treading on YOU to get there). So it's our job (we see the mess more clearly, therefore it's our JOB) to make things better.
Now this "making things better" business is not easy to do, especially for yourself as an Autist. I started small. I realised that it is often easier to actually help someone else have a better day than it is to help myself. (You just have to find someone who has a limitation that you have not, or is struggling with a situation or problem than you know how to solve). Admittedly you will find that a few people LIKE having and complaining about their "problems", but an awful lot of people are really grateful if they are struggling with something an you step in politely with a bit of grace and offer them a bit of help. The important thing is to always be successful helping others, only offer if you are darn sure you have what they need.
For yourself, there is always a trade off between following the pervasive and deep programming that society inflicts on us subliminally to be "helpless" and outsource our thinking and personal autonomy to other more "qualified" types or actually taking action ourselves.. I found I liked being clean and tidy more than I liked having the "freedom" to be slovenly some days, yet other days I could not be bothered.
I'm sorry I have to stop now, but I hope there is something you can use there.
Mental health direct we're very rude to me
Yes, it is difficult. Once people realise we have autism they don't want us around. However, we have skills! Use those skills to your advantage.
I refuse to just exist I wanna live
My father’s condom broke in 1996, Now I exist to pay bills and have crippling depression.
Not abandoned, just lost.
I’m 25, failed GCSE’s in high-school, at 16 had to stay in education and secondary school forced me on to a level 2 animal care course. Completed and moved onto level 3, got a conditional place at the royal vet college on the conditions I get distinction stars, got distinctions except in one unit as teacher never taught it, family stopped me attending college as they needed me to work to provide as sister, her partner and their daughter moved back home missed my chance at going to university. By 19 I was mental and physically I’ll suffering with sepsis as two worker jab me with a concoction of livestock medication with a dirty needle, I was also prevented from seeking medical intervention because my parent where worried it would result in their employer (same as theirs different farm) from being shut down, which lead to me getting taking advantage at a poorly regulated apprenticeship, got ran over by the co worker from previous job who stabbed me in a tractor. Then Worked in Wetherspoons where I was bully and harassed while my bother and his wife took advantage of me and took majority of my wages. from their I have returned to farming and got stabbed and poisoned again which resulted in a two week coma, I have done every employment scheme that exists and eventually got rehoused after a needs assessment which automatically told me I needed to move out of the family home at 24.
im now in my own flat, attending college 1 day a week to complete GCSE in English and maths as an adult and I’m looking into realistic education or apprenticeship with the support of the employment team.
My mother was severely mentally I'll she's dead but I'm still traumatised by it even to this Day
Day in day out being screamed at
Here is a liink to a video in which a man describing his interest in crafts reusing discarded materials, including making model trains. Here he describes his work at 'Re: See It' a mixed exhibition at the Art's Complex in St Margaret's House, Meadowbank, 2012."
Steve these last 'paintings' i've done over the weekend, i got an old video tape, that was about to go in the bin. I cut it up into little bits and made pictures with the bits by glueing them onto cardboard............ I did have to buy the glue, but that's dead cheap.
You recycle what you've got.
Hobbies don't have to cost a lot of money Strve, That art group i went to...... Creative Alternatives, we used whatever you have laying around the house, even rubbish you pick up in the street, and make art out of it. The paints i use are the cheapest kids paint i could find and i paint on any old cardboard boxes, It's just doing something to keep you occupied.
I was in the same boat with my Mum and Nan. However, I eventually found my favourite Niches.
I've never been allowed hobbies mum was too sick most if the time I had to help her then my job came along then no time
I have no hobbies I can afford, just tidying up
Join the Club, Buddy!
I have qualifications, to burn, but little work experience which isn't voluntary. A lifetime hiding from the world, and feeling sorry for myself. I guess we need to focus on Hobbies, rather than ask the outside world for help.
"Freedom isn't granted voluntary by an oppressor, it must be demanded by the oppressed!" (Martin Luther King Jr)
