Autism and sexual desire

I was somewhat [normal] when young then 50 my  wife had to have her female plumbing removed she lost interest then in my late 50's that is when I was tested and found to have autism and incontinence came along there went everything.

I had a similar story recently.

Hi, I appreciate that. I am certainly repulsed by them things too. It is strange though how obsessed I get about women in leather and boots. I honestly can't stop looking at them. It is weird. My drive is quite low when I am with a partner but if I am masterbating it feels easier and better. Less stressful. My brain can't deal with 2 things at once. I use to google pictures as it is easier for me. I prefer masterbating over a girl than actually doing out. If they do it with me it is so hard.

Everyone’s sex drive is different. There’s no “normal” amount you should want to have sex — everyone’s sexual desire and interest in sex is different, and it can change over time.

The key is to find someone who is in sync with you.

Personally, I am not compatible with anyone with a high sex drive because mine is very low. The act of sex is also problematic for me because I'm repulsed by most bodily fluids—sweat, saliva, snot, blood, puss, urine, semen, faeces, earwax; all of them gross me out apart from tears. So, I prefer to be with someone who is clean, tidy and on top of their personal hygiene (most of the time). 

Some people want to have sex every day. This would horrify me. It would feel like sexual abuse. Some people want to have sex more than once a day. I would be in favour of sending all these people to an island for the safety of the general public (just joking).  Some people rarely (or never) want to have sex. This feels more like me. Some people need to have a strong emotional connection with someone in order to be interested in sex, other people feel sexual attraction towards anyone and everyone.  

So, Anonymous, there is no normal. And there is nothing for you to worry about. Normal is whatever is normal for you.

Yes, though no fantasies or weird sexual thoughts that I can think of.  I agree about the masturbation being easier.  I do enjoy being with my husband, but it's just getting to the actual act of sex that gets me.  I'm on a lot of psych meds, however.  

1. Hi, I have been in a relationship for 3 years and find masterbation easier and more enjoyable as no pressure. I have struggled to have intercourse as I just find it all too much for my head. I use to look at porn pictures which was easier. I find I have a lot of fantasies and weird sexual thoughts which have huge urges. Has this happened to anyone? 

This has always been a difficult one for me. I have always had a particularly high drive, more than most people I think. However, as an autie I always had difficulty understanding when girls liked me or not. I would misunderstand that quite a bit and it was difficult for me, caused me a lot of problems.

I am happily married now so the issue doesnt arrise but I think single life is difficult when your autistic 

Compared with neurotypical people, autistic people are more likely to be authentic about their sexual identity, whereas neurotypical people tend to follow what everyone else around them is doing.  For this reason, gender identity and sexuality are more varied among autistic people than in the neurotypical population. Basically, autistic people tend to be more evolved because they have had less social conditioning.

One thing to consider is that a lot of autists are demisexual. It is not that we have a lower sex-drive, but that we need to have a close and secure emotional relationship with someone before we can get intimate with them. Of course, everyone is different, and that is fine, but I know that for me, I need to feel a strong emotional bond with someone before I can climb into bed with them.

The pills have a substantial effect on hormonal health. That is why it is necessary to consult a doctor before using it. Even if a woman is absolutely healthy. After pregnancy, my wife had a low libido. She told me about this problem, and we solved it together. Every night I looked for ways to solve this problem. I found quality libido supplements for women and showed them to my wife. She immediately agreed and started taking these pills. After a month, her libido increased to normal.

u're creepy

possibly SPAM --- be careful

Pills have a strong effect on hormonal health.

I know quite a few people who are hypersexual. Some are together in monogamous relationships and they work really well. Others are in polyamorous (or otherwise a it more open) relationships and they work really well too.

If there's the right communication, hypersexuality can be really positive and constructive.

Oh Wow!! Small world!!

I used to work as an outreach worker for care leavers before I became a social worker and moved to working with adults. 

Hi there

Because of Lockdown so all work from home. I cant manage this.

Thank you :

why are u the only one in your office ?  

BTW   Welcome to this forum

Wow!! your the 1st person who I have ever seen who has the same thoughts and feelings as myself. Sorry new to this group.

I think it kind of needs to be known.  Perhaps I'm a cautionary tale?  I'd certainly do some of it.  Some of it was giddying, elating, esteem boosting and enjoyable.  But I'd be open and honest about it, with myself as well as others (who might have thought this was the beginning of a proper relationship), I'd use barrier methods of contraception, I'd try not to go too far fuelled by alcohol, I'd discover cannabis edibles much sooner in life and use these instead of alcohol, I'd realise that I'm autistic and what this meant for me and my relationships and I'd cotton on to what was the mask and what was me. 

There are maybe too many "ifs" there.  Some of the things I'd did were best left in the imagination, I think.  It doesn't do to go around acting out scenes from your favourite films in some kind of delirious fantasy enactment which is very open to misinterpretation and severe judgement by others.