• Replies 10 replies
  • Subscribers 82 subscribers
  • Views 2444 views
  • Users 0 members are here
Options
Related
Hints and tips
  • To quote someone's message, first select/highlight the relevant text, and then use the Quote button that appears
  • To "mention" someone, type @ followed by the start of the forum name, and choose from the list; that person will get a notification of being mentioned

Near Meltdown While Shopping.

Plastic

I did the Sainsburys vulnerable shopping hour this morning.     

Had to be up at 4am to stabilise my body because of the other health problems - but woke up at 3am instead.   Disappointed. 

Took all my pills and waited while my body does its normal routine - it makes me feel really ill and I need 3 hours to get ready.

Got to the shop for 0700 and was 5th in line - but I'm normally with my daughter and unfortunately, she was unavailable today.  

I got questioned but the Hi-Viz man whether I should be there or not and again by the guy on the door so I had to show them my disability badge, my autism card and the other notification cards and my steroid warning card - so that left me stressed.

Got into the shop and the self-scan system was not working - This is a big problem - I have CFS so I only have a limited amount of energy - I'd been up for 5 hours now including an hour of standing outside the shop and the broken self-scan means I will have to queue again for ages at the checkouts..     I should have walked away.

Stupidly, I carried on - and found I'd forgotten my glasses so I couldn't read the shopping list or the labels on the products.- I should have walked away.

Stupidly, I carried on - but I was getting more stressed by the time-crunch to avoid the checkout queues and the inability to find what I was supposed to get - like a really bad treasure hunt with only rubbish prizes.    I should have walked away.

I got about 2/3 of the list but was getting more and more stressed and tearful - I was getting panicky and wobbly.   It's the closest I've ever come to a full public meltdown in a shop.

I'd had enough - I needed to escape - luckily, I got to a free checkout and was out of there in a couple of minutes.     The checkout lady asked me if I was ok (I obviously wasn't) but I was so messed up that I couldn't answer except to apologise to her for making her concerned.

I've been home for over 2 hours but I'm still shaking and tearful - and I'm soooo tired but too agitated to relax and sleep.  Disappointed

  • in reply to Plastic

    Your much stronger than I am. As I say I now go out just before closing and theres no queues. So today I needed milk, forgot its daytime and walked straight in. Remembered halfway up the isle it's a que system so walked out and apologised to the queue. They were really grumpy even though I explained I rarely go out and not used to this. I'd not invaded space etc I'd just jumped the queue then of my own accord joined the queue. But then at the back of the queue someone wanted a full conversation of questions....eurgh

  • in reply to mouse2

    Hi mouse - I know just how you feel - I was sooooo close to just walking away from the trolley but I was locked in the conflict of *needing* to do the week's shopping for wife & daughter and my own mental well-being.      Naturally, my needs are always less than anyone else's - which is a hard reminder of when I was being bullied at work - so there's trauma-memories popping out too.

  • in reply to Plastic

    Hi plastic, I did reply from my phone but it seem's to have disapeared now. I'm sorry you had a bad shopping trip.You did well to finish the shop. After 3 very stressful and failed attempts (I walked out and left my shopping) I now go an hour before closing. Their stocking the shelves at this time too so you can still buy most of what you need. Take care :)

  • in reply to Plastic

    That’s a good sentiment to have - I should take a leaf from your book and be more positive, it just doesn’t come naturally to me! 

  • in reply to Anthony

    I've always said that there's no such thing as a negative experience - it's just some things are nicer to learn than others..  Smiley

  • in reply to Plastic

    At least in reflection you’ve taken a positive from a negative experience - I think that’s commendable. 

  • Thanks for the support, guys - I was surprised by how much the situation overloaded me.      It's that 'doing the right thing' compulsion that forced me to carry on when all of my instincts were telling me to get out of there.     

    I faded out in the afternoon and slept on & off until about 8am - about 18 hrs - it was too much energy expended so my body reclaims it back in time instead.

    I've put things in place to make sure it doesn't happen again - I won't ever go alone again unless it's just for my things and I will back out next time if all the things I need aren't in place immediately.

    An interesting - if traumatising - learning experience.

  • I hope you feel better soon. I am in awe of your commitment to the routine of your daily life, living in general and it's a miracle that you sound so chirpy and cheerful most of the time. 

    OK I suck at showing compassion but that is what this message is supposed to resemble.

  • Best Wishes from Me to "Plastic" - I respect You a lot and so I chance a Post here, helpful or obvious or not... Again at Anthony's suggestion, I say I agree. Yet regarding shopping in general, the obvious advice would be to do it online, but, well...

    There is a thing which, even during this restriction-business, *might* still apply: especially since You mention "Sainsburys", and that is to ask for a "Shopping Assistant". They, now, might have to stand 2-Metres away but should still be available. Ask for one as soon as You are close enough to speak to a member of staff (sometimes the assistant will be the Trolley-person, yet they *are* just as capable and sympathetic.).

    ...Even before now, asking and waiting for someone to become available/free to help, might take a while (I once had to wait about 20 minutes a few Years ago), but it is useful for a helping hand and sometimes a sympathetic ear to talk to.

    If anyone is reading this yet not tried it before, I suggest first trying it when not feeling so bad and only needing a few things or simple things --- like a "test run" to see what having a "Shopping Assistant" is like. It should be no shame to admit to needing help or to have to sit for a time... something like that.

    Anyway, to Mr.Plastic, the "walking away" is indeed what I Myself often do; but I have the kind of temperament where if I am Ill then I cannot even shop in the first place, yet when I can I will not walk away but *will run away very scared and confused and angry*... or just stand stock still in place like a frightened Deer/Cat. To close this post, it is long enough & I do not know if it is useful... but here it is anyway. Glad Tidings Atchya.

  • I wish there was something I could say that would help but I know it’s something you have to let run it’s course. What I will say is you did well to persevere and prevent the meltdown so you should definitely give yourself credit for this.