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Regrets obsession

DaveAsperg

Yes I have been very successful but now seem obsessed by all the opportunities I missed mainly because I was so focussed on routines and academia and my job. So I realise I doing this I missed out taking my children to professionals football matches and national rugby matches even though we were often in Twickenham staying at my mother in laws house when the World Cup was on etc.

I know I have a lot left , but I’m stuck on all the negatives. I feel I’ve failed my wife and children.

maybe this negative focus is why autistic people have such a high suicide rate.

but I do like the joke therapy!

what do others feel about focussing on the negative and maybe having been too confident that you were doing well before.......

Any actions that have been helpful? I wonder about pursuing my effort to develop an alternative suicide prevention service as the current medical model is inappropriate for many people.

i am impressed with Russell Brand’s insight into the distress of suicide over Caroline Flack whose death was probably caused by the media and the Crown Prosecution Service. I am pleased the debate has been opened but know that the IOPC has historically always supported the cps and has never said anything against either the police force or the cps, even when coroners have raised concerns. We shall see....... but I am sure they will not criticise the authorities. They only criticise individuals that the police want to dismiss and waste loads of public money defending inappropriate police actions 

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-49955628

Parents

  • No replies. I certainly feel alone and wonder what others make of me as I no longer seem to fit anywhere. Frightening for suicidal thinking 

  • in reply to DaveAsperg

    I am thinking of you Dave, I don't know what to write. I have been through many of the same things as you, the only difference is I didn't lose a lot of money. 

    For me, what keeps me going is finding new things to explore, learning and trying to educate and inform people about how to make things better.

    I don't think you've failed your wife and children, having Asperger's is no picnic.

  • in reply to Roswell

    Roswell,

    I fall into the 'not-man-enough' mode, too. Especially whenever I'm driving in inclement weather. Just, today, my artist friend called me requesting that I purchase beans and cans of Boost to tie him up until he gets his benefits on Wednesday - He always pays me back, in good time. But, he said that his road was clear.

    The roads en route from my place to Cookstown - the main town he lives near- had flash floods due to the snow thawing. Then, I nearly stalled on the road in the town. Then, I got to his place and got stuck in his driveway due to the snow. Then, my car slid ever-so-slightly, even with the handbrake on - I nearly had a heart attack. (Metaphorical) But he put a potted plant on my rear-left tyre to keep the car safe, then helped me reverse out on the way home.

    I couldn't wallow in self-pity, for long, and became grateful for the help he gave me - and contacting my cleaner on Messenger while using my friend's Wi-Fi. I am blessed. Slight smile

    All I'm saying to Dave is, "Stay the Course! Calm waters don't make good Sailors!"

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  • in reply to Roswell

    Roswell,

    I fall into the 'not-man-enough' mode, too. Especially whenever I'm driving in inclement weather. Just, today, my artist friend called me requesting that I purchase beans and cans of Boost to tie him up until he gets his benefits on Wednesday - He always pays me back, in good time. But, he said that his road was clear.

    The roads en route from my place to Cookstown - the main town he lives near- had flash floods due to the snow thawing. Then, I nearly stalled on the road in the town. Then, I got to his place and got stuck in his driveway due to the snow. Then, my car slid ever-so-slightly, even with the handbrake on - I nearly had a heart attack. (Metaphorical) But he put a potted plant on my rear-left tyre to keep the car safe, then helped me reverse out on the way home.

    I couldn't wallow in self-pity, for long, and became grateful for the help he gave me - and contacting my cleaner on Messenger while using my friend's Wi-Fi. I am blessed. Slight smile

    All I'm saying to Dave is, "Stay the Course! Calm waters don't make good Sailors!"

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