Speaking on the phone

I am so glad you said this!    I HATE talking on the phone in a social way.  Ugg!   But I work at an ISP and I am able to talk on the phone for work.  I wondered why that was the case... and you just said it.   I know what I need to say and why it must be said.  Even in troubleshooting, I am able to keep a focused plan.  Wow.  That makes sense"

I also hate the phone, I wouldnt have one if people didnt make me. I will only answer it if I know who it is and even then sometimes I won't. I prefer people to tell me in advance that they are going to ring me using an instant message or text.

If I have to make a phone call that cannot be avoided it will be on my mind for days before hand and always envokes anxiety.

The phone seems so pointless to me anyway, so archaic. Why would I want to talk to you its so inefficient. Just message me instead, it cuts out all the waffle and gets to the point. You have a written log of the point of the interaction too so you don't have to remember anything

spektral said:

 I will only answer it if I know who it is and even them sometimes I won't.

......yep.........

I just don't like the phone. If I have to I use it I plan and write some notes first. It hard to just chat socially. If it is a more formal phonecall like making an appointment that seems more straightforward..... until something unexpected is brought into the conversation such as a question I had not thought about. Email or FB are what I prefer.

I struggle with the phone. I tend to switch conversation to whats in me head, mainly this is irrelivant to the conversation. I get words jumbled up and I don't know when it is my turn to talk. This happens in a work context and at home.

I struggle with "new" people in the flesh, but once I've met the person a few times I get better. I always get interveiws for jobs, and fluff the interview.

I find I'm ok on the phone so long as I have a definite 'agenda' to what's happening... I find it all pretty difficult either way though I guess to be honest... but definitely pauses on the phone can be difficult, and knowing when to talk.

Is it only autistics who have these kinds of problem?

I have a very weird relationship with the phone.  Generally I don't like it.  However I work supporting very challenging students and a lot of this invloces calling them or taking their calls; in a professional context I am fine, really really fine, I would even consider myself confident dealing with all sorts of things at work over the phone, sorting out problems and knowing who to ring.  And this isn't just because I am using systemizing skills, a lot of my interactions (face to face as well as over the phone) involve using empathy, sympathy and compassion.

I completely fall down however when I have to call a friend or when a friend calls me or texts me or anything really, it can either just stumpt me - why are they calling, will they ask me to do something I'm not 'prepared to do'.

Even worse and more bizzarely, it struggle the most when I have to call an organization or professional body for my own benefit.  It completely fall appart even when thinking about calling my gas or electric suppliers, or the bank or booking something over the phone.  I end up putting things off and off until its too late, it's something about having to do something for myself that trips me up.  It's related to my inability to understand my role I think in that kind of context - at work, professionally, it is much easier as I know what my role is and what is expected of me, it's when this blurs that I run into most of my problems.

This is why I prefer talking on the phone. I often rock backwards and forwards when stressed, and I do this when on the phone, but the person can't see me.

I much prefer talking on the phone to face to face, having conversations in person makes me feel so anxious even with people I've known all my life such as my parents. On the phone however it's much easier because I can stim away, don't have to worry about eye contact and I can always end the conversation quite quickly and without as much awkwardness. I do have a tendancy to talk in the wrong places so I either end up talking over someone or not saying anything when I'm guessing they want a response.

I think having to cover reception duties at a solicitor's when I was younger helped as I had to talk to not just the public but people who could be quite annoyed/upset/worried. I also covered reception alot at a chemical company as I was far too efficent in my usual job of accounts clerk (I always had my work finished by lunch time so was shipped off to other departments or sent home early).

I have a huge phobia about talking on the phone, especially to people I don't know, mainly because they can't see me.  I'm not very good at spontaneous responses and I often pause or hesitate to answer.  If the person can see me they can see that I'm thinking up a reply, but on the phone that doesn't apply and they often think that we've been cut off.

I feel exactly the same!

I find it hard speaking to people in both ways! Speaking on the phone is so awkward, but then again so is speaking face to face :( If I had my way, I wouldn't talk to anybody, only family!