Discovering that I might be autistic.

I've had a look at that book - it seems like a good read. I can relate to some of the situations from what i've read. Thanks for the suggestion(s)

a freeze is a "shutdown" which is just as common as "meltdown". have a look at some links - eg https://www.autismwestmidlands.org.uk/wp-content/uploads/2017/11/Meltdown_shutdown.pdf

Well done for talking to your friend and your teacher about your thoughts. It's good that you have trusted people you can confide in. (I'm a secondary school teacher by the way)

Why don't you do some reading (books/online) about autism? "Freaks Geeks and Asperger syndrome" is a good book for teenagers, and there is the "curly girl" book series/website as well (some of which needs a paid subscription though).

It was very simple, if somewhat lengthy. From the time I got my gp to refer me to my diagnosis was about 16 months. 

In terms of what it means to me, or how I reacted to it, I felt relief that my relative lack of emotional experience was not a sign of something sinister. It also explained a lot of my wife's frustrations with me. 

It also helps with my work, explaining my difficulties with meeting clients etc. It doesn't stop me having meetings, but I know why I hate it so.

I have been very lucky in my life but not without challenge, knowing sooner may have helped, I doubt it would have hindered.

Thanks.

Although i'm fairly confident that I might be somewhere on the spectrum (probably close to aspergers). Part of me self doubts this. 

My major "issues" are (non exhaustive):

• Socialising - I struggle to make small talk and I don't talk to someone unless they initiate the conversation. I've never really made a good friend until this point. The "friends" i have had before have just turned out to be people who either wanted something from me or used me. I've never shared "age typical" interests with people such as football, TV or anything else. I've always been described as someone who talks like an adult and as such have never really fitted in. 
• Social situations tend to make make me anxious and i'll do anything to get out of them. 
• I overreact to loud noises or sudden unexpected noises - people usually take the mickey out of me because of this. For example a loud bang or someone scrunching paper. 
• Routine - my life is routine, I do the same thing day in day out. if I know at a specific time I'm going to meet with someone and it does not happen, i get quite upset. I also overplan everything to a point that is not described as "normal" e.g navigation
• Odd Interests - Whenever I walk into a building I notice things that are deemed as "odd". Minute details in electrical, joinery and paintwork, arrangement of ceiling tiles, brand of light fixtures and bulbs. 

Why I think I might not be autistic or on the spectrum:

1. I would not say I have many issues with non verbal communication, i'm okay with it. However, I am sometimes accused of staring during a conversation. I have also have been asked repeatedly over the years why I don't smile. I might be happy about something but I don't smile. Others never seem to understand this. 
2. I don't experience "meltdowns" - I usually just temporarily freeze or just walk away to escape a social situation. 
3. I would not say my life has been majorly impacted. I've learned to live with rejection, no or 1-2 friends and social isolation but i've always found a way to cope. 

What was the process like getting a diagnosis as an adult?

I've recently been diagnosed ASD Level 1 (Asperger's) at the age of 55.  I wish I'd known earlier as it would have (perhaps) made a difference to some of my choices/experiences. Personally I can't see a down side to having a clear diagnosis but then I have managed to function reasonably well, despite socialising issues and some conversation limitations. I have a good job and was married for 30yrs, unfortunately recently widowed.  I would think if you are continuing your education you have good potential for a fulfilling future.

Hearing from someone else's perspective definitely helps. Thank you. 

Hi, ive been in a similar situation as you the past few months, although i am twice your age.

For 10 years ive been diagnosed with anxiety/GAD, and in the past few months started counselling , first with a group, then individually. Both counsellors seperately without consulting each other said they suspected i have aspergers. 

Like you i was very shocked and confused when the first counsellor suggested this to me, id never considered the possibility, and once i started researching realised that the signs were there and it would explain a lot of things in my life. 

What i did since it was first brought to my attention, is spend a few weeks researching, looking into pros and cons of diagnosis etc, trying to decide what i wanted to do. I gave myself a few weeks to just process the possibility. 

Then i realised there would likely be a very long wait if i did proceed with assessment, so i decided to see my gp and get a referral, thinking that if i changed my mind and decided not to i could, but at least the process was underway. 

Now the longer i wait the more i want to know, as it keeps coming up in my therapy sessions, and it also would help me to have a firm diagnosis as i have issues at work, particularly with communication, difficulties in an open plan office, and relationships with collegues. Ive completed the initial step (RAADS14 screening) and now waiting to find out if im recommended for a full assessment. 

I cant tell you what to do, this is just my perspective and how i am tackling the situation, i didnt mean to ramble and not sure if this helps at all?