Published on 12, July, 2020
Been diagnosed with aspergers for about year and a half now. I'm 33. After days of seeing new people or being around people is kinda stressful and after a while i need a bit of me time... bit of winding down to relax. Music on and just listen for hours.. Feels good to just be me with music on. I can make myself feel grounded then and process things in my time.
The thing that bothers me is, if i don't have me time and leave it, i tend to get more and more moody and not wanna go out or do anything. Is this normal to feel like this? The less me time i have, i tend to feel more numb with emotions. Seems kind of selfish when reading it back. I don't like having to wind down to feel some sort of normal.
Anyone else like this.
Yes! and my life is better now that I (mostly) am alone as much as I need to be.
I tried to change myself in the past and be more outgoing and sociable because that's how I thought I should be, when in reality it didn't work for me at all and it kind of felt like I lost myself for a long time. Like you said about being 'numb with emotions', along with not being able to not wear a mask, so it got to the point where I didn't even feel like myself on my own.
So now I try to just follow what feels right for me. In fact I probs spend too much time on my own these days, which is unhealthy in a different way, but it's better than the other way round (I've heard there's a thing called 'balance' but I'm not very good at it).
It's not selfish to feel like you need some alone time, and it's not selfish to be alone. That's just how you are and what you need. I'd call it self-preservation