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Life has broken my heart

Roswell

People pick on me all the time and no one gets it. I can't be myself. They try to force me to be something else and even if I dressed like them, talked like them, walked like them, they'd still tear into me.

I've heard people say look for the people you can get along with but I can't find them.

Every day I go outside I feel like crying, sometimes I do get home and cry.

Parents

  • I think I will have to move to London soon. I will miss my mother, who is 70, because I am scared of how she will cope as she gets older. But she lives with my dad, a brutal bully who made my life hell for many years.

    I feel she made her choice, and I can't stay in this town much longer, I believe, since it's full of small minded, provincial bigots.

    But I tried. I went to college and tried to make something of my self and the other students messed around, disrupted the class and I learned little. And got not very far. I became tired. And I lost motivation. And such is life. 

  • in reply to Roswell

    Why will you move to London? I moved when I was 17 (I was made homeless at this age when my parents split) I found it too much to cope with in London and was taken advantage of there more than ever. Dont do anything rash. 

    Whats your go to chill out thing, go and do that. (
    mine is listening to 1940s stories for example!) or call samaritans their really good and non judgemental 

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  • in reply to Roswell

    Why will you move to London? I moved when I was 17 (I was made homeless at this age when my parents split) I found it too much to cope with in London and was taken advantage of there more than ever. Dont do anything rash. 

    Whats your go to chill out thing, go and do that. (
    mine is listening to 1940s stories for example!) or call samaritans their really good and non judgemental 

Children
  • in reply to mouse2

    I feel like there's a cultural problem with the people in my area that goes beyond the NT/Autistic differences. I think the people here are cold and hard because of the history of industrial poverty in the area. From age 0 to 6 I lived in a coal mining town in North West England, then my family moved to a village in North Wales where I grew up. Then around age 18 we moved back to the coal mining town, we didn't like it at all so we moved then to a small town in Mid Wales. I found that a hard place to live so I got a flat in another North West England town, that was a drag too. So after 4 years I moved back to the Mid Wales town and back in with my parents. Then in that Mid Wales town I got to feeling sick of it and my mother wanted to live by the sea so now we live in a seaside town in North West England. This town is pretty nice, beautiful architecture and had an amazing history but it's near a very deprived area and has become more filled up with problems and changed over the years. 

    But I sometimes think the whole of the UK has gone to the dogs. I don't feel much hope at the moment. But the idea of going to London was to get away from the hardened industrial north and to see if the south is more laidback.

    I had some decent conversations with the Samaritans last night. I'm not sure what chills me out. I watch Seinfeld episodes sometimes.

    Sorry you got taken advantage of, that stinks.