Anyone here been diagnosed as *not* autistic?

Yes but at least one way or another you'll be closer to knowing who you are.

This is the outcome that scares me. I'm probably a very long way off from the evaluation seeing as I was only referred just over 6 weeks ago but the fear of what will happen if told that I'm not autistic already messes with me quite a bit. To me finally having some kind of potential explanation for why I am this way is a massively comforting snuggly blanket that has done a lot to ward off the self loathing and depression that has often gone along with me whenever I have struggled of been overwhelmed and run away from situations. Being told no feels like it would be a lot like having the rug yanked out from under my feet. At the same time though as much as I fear it I also long for the evaluation to potentially squish any doubts that I might have. Does/did anyone else feel like that in the waiting period? Both desperate for it AND dreading it in equal measure for the way it could set solid ground under your feet or knock you back down?

Have you taken the females with autism module on the NAS website? Its free till end of March. It recommends assessors dont just look at scores on tests but delve deeper using extensive questionning as female presentation of AS is often very subtle.

Maybe your assessor didnt ask thr right questions....

Thanks "Christmas Cards" :-)

The interviewer even faked the numbers in her written report!!! 

And this is what I am going to write to her (it is part of a long letter):

"Actually, looking at the numbers, you probably confused AQ score with EQ score because my score in AQ is well above 40 and my score for EQ is around 26.

Additionally to it the total available score for Empathy Questionnaire (EQ) is 80. You are writing 60. Do you not confuse the amount of questions – 60 – with the score? The test consists of 60 questions where 20 do not count to any conclusion, only 40 play a role where you can get 2 points for a question (40 x 2 = 80), all together no more than 80. (I learned about the key to the EQ on Saturday because I couldn’t understand the results you have presented in your report – and I knew my results for the tests AQ and EQ and these did not correspond entirely with your report)."

She has made also many other mistakes in he superficial assessment :-(

So I am writing a letter to her plus a copy to my GP.

In case she won't answer, or she won't correct her mistakes, I'll write to her boss. We'll see what happens.

It is a curse to have to do with autistic people, they find mistakes all the time, and they are so mean, they show these too! Am I right? :-)

See you later :-) Have to go! Rhia

Hi Rhia thanks for answering. I don't know why I didn't spot your answer earlier!

Don't worry about taking time telling your story - this is a great place to do that.

I can relate to a lot of what you say in your "In the reality ....." paragraph.

What are the next steps for you? Do you get to see your assessor again?

By the way, Autism Research Center, Cambridge https://www.autismresearchcentre.com/ there is an interesting article (pdf)   Experience of mental health diagnosis and perceived misdiagnosis in autistic, possibly autistic and non-autistic adults   

In general it says:  "Autistic and possibly autistic participants ... compared to non-autistic participants, were less likely to agree with their diagnoses. 

Thematic analysis revealed the participants’ main reasons for disagreement were that

(1) they felt their autism characteristics were being confused with mental health conditions by healthcare professionals and

(2) they perceived their own mental health difficulties to be resultant of ASC.

Participants attributed these to the clinical barriers they experienced, including healthcare professionals’ lack of autism awareness and lack of communication, which in turn prevented them from receiving appropriate support. This study highlights the need for autism awareness training for healthcare professionals and the need to develop tools and interventions to accurately diagnose and effectively treat mental health conditions in autistic individuals."

Just thought this information fits well with this thread :-)

Like @NAS51403 I had my assessment on Monday (!!!) 25.02.2019. It left me completely depressed, confused, and absolutely exhausted... :-/

My interviewer was ... an Occupational Therapist! Well, that's may be O.K. A nice lady with a tiny voice... was she afraid to ask me questions? Possibly. It looked like.

At the end she said that it is not what they are looking for. I am able to describe different people well. I am not joking!

In the reality I (64, female - yes I am old!) am showing the typical ASD traits: desire for having friends but never had any (!), social situations are unwelcome and confusing, prefer to work alone, socially naive (always have been!), poor eye contact, but no flapping hands (oh, yes but only when nobody can see it - just forgot to tell it to the interviewer!), hating small talk, very literal interpretation of conversations, the last one who understands jokes, loving routines and hating any interruptions, highly focused on areas of interest, some tantrums and no ability to stop these, very detail oriented, loving to build computers together :-) (OK, it's not very autistic), prefer detailed technical information over abstract, not much interest in other people, difficulty to communicate needs, ... many other traits, do not want to be bore you with these all well known things.

O.K., after I finally will receive the report of my interviewer I will ask her: "Why do I have all these characteristics when I am so neurotypical?" Does she have any explanation for this? Well, probably she will have!

I am completely frustrated & devastated.

Finally I found a niche where I feel home (being on the Spectrum somewhere), and through it, I understand myself much better, and can understand my meltdowns better (for example when my routine is interrupted, or when my focus on my work is interrupted, etc), and can understand why I cannot stop these meltdowns (not able to count to three before meltdown)...

But the niche is taken away by PROBABLY false assessment ... Sorry for taking your time with my problems :-/

Yes, I agree too! Thanks for sharing your experience - it's very helpful to hear more about non-diagnosis outcomes! And I think that the discussion of how she came to the conclusion is very useful too. Finally I think you have done very well in trying to understand oneself and explain the difficulties in life, and I wish you all the best in the continuation of that journey. 

with research I have developed coping strategies for daily life eg ear plugs and down time, I also accept and understand my past e.g I have had issues with drugs alcohol and relationships.  I thought i was psychotic due to my meltdowns but now I understand I'm not I'm just wired differently.

Not rambling at all - very interesting. Thanks for taking the time to answer. Yes I agree that more discussion of what a "no" means would be helpful.....

This sounds like a good resolution for you, and I'm taking the same view (hence my username!). I'm going to live the second half of my life (with a bit of luck!) as *me*.

yes I was assessed back in September and told I was not autistic, it was a poor assessment after an 19 month wait, I think it was a case of an inexperienced assessor, I had a Childs assessment essentially. I was told at the end of the assessment I don't flap my hands and I was good at conversation because I spoke about one of my interests. I complained and wrote a letter disputing all the points I felt were incorrect as I remember the assessment word for word like only an autistic can e.g the assessor stated my poor organisational skills mean I'm not autistic as people with autism are very organized - stereotype and not fact! 

 my gp also complained on my behalf. in my letter I said I do not wish to take the issue further as I don't fancy another 18month wait to be patronized by a clueless 'psychologist' also through my own research I have learned  there is little to no help for autistic adults anyway. I have read countless books, web pages, etc on autism obsessively and know it fits me. I know my own brain as it has been inside my head my entire life!

what I have learned is to stop pushing myself to be someone I am not, to rest more, and accept myself for who I am. I think that is all you can do, diagnosed or not.

Hi there, I had my diagnostic assessment on Monday and was told I am not autistic. I had thought I was autistic for about a year. I scored 47 on the AQ and 141/200 on another neurodiverse test (I can't remember the name right now) but more than this I had so many aha! moments when I read descriptions of autism in females. So many things fell into place. I felt like I had found my tribe. This was such a comfort to me. 

At the start of my assessment I was told I would be given the result at the end of the day with a follow up report 2-4 weeks later. I was also told only about a third of people they assessed met the criteria for autism.

I felt there were so many things we didn't discuss during the assessment but they obviously weren't the things they were looking for. They also explained there are lots of other things that "look like" autism but aren't. 

The process was difficult and exhausting. In the end I was told I am not autistic and given examples of why she had reached that conclusion. She also gave examples of why someone might demonstrate the same behaviour but due to another reason similar to examples you gave on another post.

For me,  this was never about a label but about trying to understand myself and explain my difficulties. I am slowly coming to terms with it after all she is the expert. I only wish more people would discuss a non diagnosis. I really didn't even consider it as a possibility. 

I don't know what your outcome will be but if it is a "no" you might want to look up HSP as there is a cross over with the characteristics described for both groups. 

I'm sorry if I have rambled on, I haven't posted online before.

 Good luck!