Do I tell people

I greatly admire Martian Tom's approach to being autistic. I tend not to tell anyone, although I feel like it must be obvious to people who know me that l'm DIFFERENT. It's a good question which I need to think about some more.  

If you do don’t use the word mild people mite brush it of as nothing. I look like a normal but I have autism and a learning disability I don’t like telling people unless I need to.

My policy on this is very flexible. It's not a secret, but nor is it something that I would tell everyone, and it's not something I reveal in its entirety.

The people who I'm closest to all know now that I'm autistic. I had some strange reactions at first, but no-one so dismissive that, over time, I haven't been able to explain in more detail so that they've slowly come to understand better. However, it should be said that most of them were well aware of my long history of mental health problems, and always tried to support me with those, so I think that my diagnosis has been seen by them as explanatory, just as it has been for me.

With other people, I have never just "come out" with a big announcement; people's reactions can be very negative and insulting sometimes, so I always give myself a little time to get to know them first, so that I have some idea how they might react. In particular, I look for how they react to my autistic traits when they have been noticeable. In many cases, just explaining a particular trait that is causing difficulty is sufficient; "I'm just one of those people who....". Even with people who are sympathetic, it's worth weighing up whether being bombarded with "so what's it like?" questions and having to counter misinformation is worth the bother for relatively casual or fleeting interactions, or with people who's opinions you aren't going to be able to change.

So there's no black-and-white decision between tell everyone or tell no-one; I take it case by case, weight up the pro's and con's, and decide accordingly whether I'll say nothing, admit to a particular trait, or reveal my diagnosis.

You should also take into account other people's tendency to gossip. What you tell to one person can easily be spread around very quickly. They may well have no bad intent in mind, but it means that people could potentially find out who you would rather didn't know. At the very least, you should be very explicit with people about how public or secret what you're telling them is

I would be careful about telling your employer - depending on your management and HR department's attitude to disabilities. It can be used against you if they choose not to support you - you might become 'too much bother' - so even though nothing has changed about you or your worrk, they might start to look at you very differently.

They might start treating you like a hand grenade with the pin pulled out - just waiting for you to do something that they can make a mountain out of.

If your employer is positive and caring about their staff - go for it.

It is definitely your decicion but you should.weigh everything up.carefully.

I do not think terms.such as 'mild' or 'slight'' autism are particularly helpful (nor for that matter 'severe') since they gloss over the needs and abilities of the person. You are autistic and in one way or another this manifests itself in many ways, and it is more than likely there is an autistic time bomb within ready to detonate in all its glory, in a spectacular display of what NTs would call 'unaccepable behaviour' or cause severe depression and anxiety.

I was having great problems at work and had to declare my autism, without so doing I would have been dismissed.  My assessor helpfully produced a detailed statement as to how I was affected and what adjustments should be made, and it opened the way for funding via Access to Work for a couple of sessions a month with a support worker.

You must have felt you were 'different' to seek a diagnosis, and however well you try to hide it, in all probability others will have noticed some quirks you may have that appear 'strange' to them. They may  not recognise this as autism, but they may make crass comments or remarks at times. My experience of 'coming out' was very positive and it does not affect who I am, it just explains things. I am not embarrassed or ashamed of my autism, but I don't shout about it to my neighbours or people I meet, but when I think it might be helpful I will say so.  It has never been a hindrance to me in that sense.

Not all families will accept it, many many reasons, only you can judge wether they will accept it or be dismissive.

 I am happy you got your disgnosis.. please search on here, we are all individuals and each have many variables to add to our life experiences.

As for work, you don’t need to unless you feel you need support in some form or another.

 Basically you don’t need to tell anyone, it’s purely a personal choice.

 Some will accept you for who you are, sadly some won’t understand and possibly say i

unkind things without even realising they cause upset.

Others namely work colleagues may just use it to form an ill judged idea of who you are, 

I wish you well and hope whatever you do it works out ok for you.

I am not formerly diagnosed but still I tell “some” people I meet I am autistic,,,those I feel may be non judgemental and allow me to be myself.

 Yes I have judged that wrongly but the majority have been ok. I have had to explain what it means to me, sadly one or two who think they know what autism is assume I am either non verbal and sit around flapping my hands or brain of Britain.

I do try to educate them. Anf

d often succeed, 

take care and be kind to yourself.

Family, yes. Work, probably best to. But no, you don't need to tell everyone.

I would personally think carefully before I do so, as after you've told someone, you can't "untell".