Meditation

Hello Kate

A few questions first, how long have you been meditating, what practice do you use and what are your expectations?

I’m no expert but I’ve been meditating daily, usually shortly after I get up, for 7 years. I use a combination of techniques, I use the Insight Timer App, you can download from the App Store, it has hundreds of meditation practises and is very helpful. I also use the Mindfulness of Breathing and the Metta Bhavana. Equally I’ve been part of the London Buddhist Centre for the same amount of time.

There’s a great myth about meditation and being in some calm and tranquil state. Of course you might be but equally it can be a reflection of how you are in the moment, it is what it is. You cannot force it to be something!

We all have overactive minds, we cannot make our minds blank. So when meditating and a thought pops into our minds, we observe it but don’t dwell on it or get enmeshed with it, just allow it to pass through and sure enough the same thought will appear again or a different thought will show itself, observe and let it pass through, don’t dwell on it or make it an issue.

If you haven’t been taught how to meditate, then I’d suggest you join a group if that’s possible. Meditating together can be very powerful. Find a teacher too, if that’s possible.

i do think meditation helps me but it can be hard work, it’s not always easy but one must try and be committed and stay with it, whatever comes up.

Curb your expectations. I hope this helps?

Hi MArt - thank you - this is really helpful. I have not heard of the Apps etc that you mention - I will look at these. I’m so glad that meditation is helpful to you. I have a lot of confidence in it so I’m going to try to overcome my difficulties. I’ve been listening to the teachings of Thich Nhat Hanh and Plum Village - and these have been helpful on multiple levels, but I’ve still struggled with meditation practice. I have so much anxiety and ptsd - my mind is very active, restless and full of so many fearful thoughts and traumatic memories, and they come up and it’s hard to not struggle with them when they arise. Breathing focused meditation is difficult for me as I have some heath/trauma issues with breathing, and so many meditation practices involve focussing on the breath! So that’s a huge problem. I’ve tried repeating a mantra but (I know this sounds ridiculous!) I cannot seem to settle on a mantra that ‘feels right’ to me. This in itself demonstrates how unsettled a state my mind is in! I realise that my approach is intrinsically too ‘grasping’ - I feel I’m ‘trying too hard’ and that’s part of the problem. But with so much anxiety and ptsd it’s so hard to not be reactive to the thoughts I have - some of which are so dark and painful.

i think you’re right that to go to a group would be helpful - but that would be very hard for me as I find it so hard to be relaxed with people I don’t know, especially groups. I’m typically autistic in that sense. Plus I live in a fairly isolated rural  community in an area where there are very few things like that - I’ve never seen anything locally about Buddhism or meditation groups, it’s not that kind of place! 

Thank you for your help - I really appreciate it. I have a lot of faith in the ability of these practices to help people. I’m very interested in finding things that can help autistic people with their high levels of anxiety etc - my son is also autistic and we’ve both had conventional therapy from the nhs (mainly CBT) but it’s not been very helpful (for my son in particular he had a year of CBT and didn’t seem to benefit at all). 

Anyway, thank you for your help. 

Kate

A lot of places do meditation online, I know the London Buddhist Centre do and therefore you can be anywhere in the country or abroad and join in. Maybe that might help?

Kate

A lot of places do meditation online, I know the London Buddhist Centre do and therefore you can be anywhere in the country or abroad and join in. Maybe that might help?