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Middle aged ASD diagnosis.......and stuffed?

JamesB
22 days ago

Hello,

So after more than half a lifetime of feeling different and never really understanding other people, I have received an ASD diagnosis 3 months shy of my 48th birthday Dizzy face. I have suffered from 'depression and anxiety' throughout adulthood, and have been working my way through the NHS library of SSRIs and SNRIs as each successive medication appeared to lose its efficacy. Fortunately, or unfortunately depending on how you see things, I have been able to mask, compensate and 'sort of manage' too effectively over the years for anyone to ask serious questions until the Covid Lockdowns finally pushed me over the edge.

I kind of understand now how I've ended up where I am, but that doesn't really detract from the frustration of it: getting on for fifty, no 'real' friends, no partner, no plan for the future. And it feels like no time left to do anything about it. As is my way (ha-ha, but not funny) I am desperately trying to work out a plan (my therapist is doing what she can to help), but it feels like I am stuffed.

I'm assuming that someone on here can relate to this?

Parents
  • 21 days ago

    Yes, I can relate too. Discovered I was on the spectrum in my early fifties. Total shock. Had to quickly learn what autism actually was. 

    I've had some years to come to terms with it, but still struggle some days. But now I know why, and I make my own adjustments as much as possible. You have to try to learn to be kind to yourself. it can feel like a big change, but nothing has really changed. You are still the same person you always were.

    We are all different but all have our strengths. Some of us are artistic, some musical, some good at puzzles and games, some have a gift in understanding animals - yours could be one of these, or something completely different. Identify your strengths and try to plan how to use them, whether it's to find a new job, do some voluntary work, join a club, or just start a new hobby or interest at home if you don't feel up to going out much at the moment. But if/when you do feel up to going out, joining a club to do something you are interested in might help you make friends.

    Good luck on your journey.

Reply
  • 21 days ago

    Yes, I can relate too. Discovered I was on the spectrum in my early fifties. Total shock. Had to quickly learn what autism actually was. 

    I've had some years to come to terms with it, but still struggle some days. But now I know why, and I make my own adjustments as much as possible. You have to try to learn to be kind to yourself. it can feel like a big change, but nothing has really changed. You are still the same person you always were.

    We are all different but all have our strengths. Some of us are artistic, some musical, some good at puzzles and games, some have a gift in understanding animals - yours could be one of these, or something completely different. Identify your strengths and try to plan how to use them, whether it's to find a new job, do some voluntary work, join a club, or just start a new hobby or interest at home if you don't feel up to going out much at the moment. But if/when you do feel up to going out, joining a club to do something you are interested in might help you make friends.

    Good luck on your journey.

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