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I'm curious, how do women/girls on the spectrum deal with dating?

SJH1994

I'm asking this as a male, so hope its okay, as its just a subject I was curious about

I often here how there is a difference in autistic behaviours between boys/men and girls/women, I was just wondering how this pans out in the dating world? I know a lot of males struggle in this regard, and are not as easy at hiding autistic traits such as social awkwardness, whereas women on the whole -I underline ON THE WHOLE, seem to be better at masking and dealing with social situations, I was wondering if there are any women who may have difficulty in this regard, ie feeling a bit overwhelmed, struggled with social situations and have not been able to participate in dating and are single as a result, or whether anyone has not really struggled so much, as I have seen it mentioned that autistic women are more likely to be partnered/married than autistic men.

Note-My experience with this and my current situation is fairly typical of many autistic men

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  • I met my boyfriend on Tinder, I always dated online and then met in person somewhere public. I would highly mask and be very anxious at first, but overtime I realised I could be myself, and turns out he is undiagnosed neurodivergent haha! I got diagnosed since we’ve been together and has nearly been 5 years now. We plan on getting married. It is difficult at first, and finding the right person isn’t easy. But it’s definitely easier to talk online first I think, and if you meet up and they’re not right for you, you just gotta keep trying. It took me 3 times to get it right, over 3 years. I suggest looking for another neurodiverse person though, it definitely turns out being a better relationship that way, we never argue and get on really well and can understand eachother more.

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  • I met my boyfriend on Tinder, I always dated online and then met in person somewhere public. I would highly mask and be very anxious at first, but overtime I realised I could be myself, and turns out he is undiagnosed neurodivergent haha! I got diagnosed since we’ve been together and has nearly been 5 years now. We plan on getting married. It is difficult at first, and finding the right person isn’t easy. But it’s definitely easier to talk online first I think, and if you meet up and they’re not right for you, you just gotta keep trying. It took me 3 times to get it right, over 3 years. I suggest looking for another neurodiverse person though, it definitely turns out being a better relationship that way, we never argue and get on really well and can understand eachother more.

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  • in reply to faespirit

    Thats nice for you. Yes, I think another neurodivergent person is ideally the way to go with dating as a neurodivergent person. I'm currently in the process of trying online dating but haven't even reached the finding someone to talk too stage yet,have been trying for eight months so far, have had one or two matches but never replied when I messaged either of them despite matching with me..

    I think the hardest part with online dating as a neurodivergent person is finding the right platform to use