Late diagnosed

Hello

I've just been diagnosed with Autism but told my family about a year ago I was going for it, got my adhd diagnosis April 2024. I don't know if it's just me but I feel my family have been so dismissive, to me this is life changing, I've had poor mental health my whole life with quite serious epsiodes that my famly know about and the person that has reacted the absolute worst is my own mother, people who reacted the best, my undiagnosed neurodivergent friends that Ive known since childhood.

I've had alot of comments like 'everyone has problems' 'everyone is a little bit ADHD' to purely just ignoring it, like one perosn I know said 'Ha! interesting" like am I going mad? I don't think, in fact I know if someone opened up to me and told me that I would see the enormatity of it. My Mum also won't acknowledge my comments about my daugher having it either. We just had an argument as I opened up and said she was upsetting me with her lack of interest and she flew off the handle and said everyone has problems and that why am I always so sensitive and I havent even asked how she is lately. Some people I've told and theyve simply not got back to me.

Is this a common occurance?

Parents
  • Same with me. I was assessed (i don't like that word, 'diagnosed', as it helps to pathologise my diversity) 8 months ago, aged 66, and have felt dismissed by all and sundry ever since. While on holiday just post-assessment, my cousin told me to stop talking about being autistic and act 'normally'; none of my friends and family have engaged in any way with my assessment, and in conversation with other people - acquaintances, professionals & the like - have been told things like, "aren't we all somewhere on the spectrum?" and "we've all got issues to deal with." I've even been told that, since people like Nigel Farage believe there are 'too many' people being assessed nowadays that it's no longer a legitimate concern. We're heading into murky territory and i feel there's nowhere to turn to. When i contacted my local branch of the NAS, pre-assessment, they turned me away saying they could only help me post-assessment, then when i got back in touch afterwards, they never even bothered to reply. It's like, once we get that confirmation, we're also handed our 'superpower' of invisibility. People no longer see us. I haven't had a single 'real world' conversation in which i didn't feel dismissed.

Reply
  • Same with me. I was assessed (i don't like that word, 'diagnosed', as it helps to pathologise my diversity) 8 months ago, aged 66, and have felt dismissed by all and sundry ever since. While on holiday just post-assessment, my cousin told me to stop talking about being autistic and act 'normally'; none of my friends and family have engaged in any way with my assessment, and in conversation with other people - acquaintances, professionals & the like - have been told things like, "aren't we all somewhere on the spectrum?" and "we've all got issues to deal with." I've even been told that, since people like Nigel Farage believe there are 'too many' people being assessed nowadays that it's no longer a legitimate concern. We're heading into murky territory and i feel there's nowhere to turn to. When i contacted my local branch of the NAS, pre-assessment, they turned me away saying they could only help me post-assessment, then when i got back in touch afterwards, they never even bothered to reply. It's like, once we get that confirmation, we're also handed our 'superpower' of invisibility. People no longer see us. I haven't had a single 'real world' conversation in which i didn't feel dismissed.

Children
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