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What is it like for you making friends

emmy2654

I was officially diagnosed with level 2 autism about three days ago. when they called to talk about the results they gave my parents ideas about going out and different groups to make friends. However I have trouble making friends and keeping them I only have one friend at the moment and that’s all I feel I can manage. I feel if I had more it would just cause me stress and physically and mentally wear me out as that has happened in the past. I feel like if I had more than one friend it would cause a lot of drama and problems that I couldn’t handle. How do you all manage to make friends and handle more than one friend without getting tired and mentally and physically worn out.  

Parents

  • I have a small friendship group probably comprised of 5 people at most and I do have really good acquaintances but I'm completely fine with that. I too have always struggled making friends ever since I was a child. Half of it is do with the fact that I struggle massively with social anxiety like the idea of being forced into a situation where I have to converse with stranger causes me panic attacks. I think I managed to be within my friendship group is that I met them through volunteer work and it was them who made the first move to include me which I am very grateful for but I can never be the one to start a conversation with someone new. Anyways, my point is I totally understand how difficult it can be

  • in reply to WitchyPrincess06

    Groups! Why do people assume that everybody who has problems making friends, who has ASC, etc needs to go to a group? Is there some part of being uncomfortable in crowded places they don't understand, that groups can be very age specific? That just because you have ASC you're going to instantly get on with every other ASC person in the world?

    Sorry, not very helpful I know, I've given up on having friends, when I think of what I put in compared to what I get back, it dosen't add up in a good way, I still feel isolated, far ore so than I do when I'm on my own, the loneliest times in my life have been when I've been surrounded by people.

  • in reply to TheCatWoman

    Same here. In secondary school I remember teachers getting me in a group with other peers so I didn't feel alone yet I felt like my peers only participated out of obligation. I wouldn't say I don't have friends but I am very careful with them because I've had poor experiences of being let down by others before.

    Also, social anxiety doesn't help because I really hate being thrust into group situations with people I don't know very well; I end up having to be forced to play a role to try to fit in and I hate it. Now, I don't force myself into groups if it is too much pressure - I need to somewhat pace myself and do it on my own terms rather than someone else's.

    I guess because I work as a receptionist, I need time to be alone because being around lots of people everyday becomes exhausting. I do like my colleagues and get on well with them - it is just my social battery drains very easily.

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  • in reply to TheCatWoman

    Same here. In secondary school I remember teachers getting me in a group with other peers so I didn't feel alone yet I felt like my peers only participated out of obligation. I wouldn't say I don't have friends but I am very careful with them because I've had poor experiences of being let down by others before.

    Also, social anxiety doesn't help because I really hate being thrust into group situations with people I don't know very well; I end up having to be forced to play a role to try to fit in and I hate it. Now, I don't force myself into groups if it is too much pressure - I need to somewhat pace myself and do it on my own terms rather than someone else's.

    I guess because I work as a receptionist, I need time to be alone because being around lots of people everyday becomes exhausting. I do like my colleagues and get on well with them - it is just my social battery drains very easily.

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