Published on 12, July, 2020
Hey I’m 22 (F) 23 in 2 months, in a relationship with a 35 (m)
He’s got 2 kids 11(m) and 9(m) that stay with us 1 day a week not a lot I know. But I feel like a parent all the time if I’m not helping look after the boys I’m basically taking care of my partner. I cook I clean I do the washing I support him financially.
Im seeing a youth worker at the moment and she thinks I’ll be better off away from him as our relationship isn’t the best. I’m really struggling but at the same time I don’t want to leave him. I do love him and he says he loves me. But there are issues. He seems to think that a relationship is 75% bedroom visits (if you know what I mean) whereas I’m not interested in that what’s so ever and I don’t feel the same way. These aren’t our only issues but it’s the one that crops up the most often. Am I wrong? is there something wrong with me? Has anyone else felt this way? Am I harming him more by being this way? Thanks
It sounds like you two just have different views of what a relationship should be like, and that's okay. You may love each other, but in all honesty it doesn't sound like this relationship is making you happy.
I'm also 22 and I couldn't imagine mothering two children, one of whom is only half my age.
Also it's perfectly ok for you not to be into sex. There's nothing wrong with you. He needs to find someone who's as interested in that as he is, rather than you feeling guilty for not living up to his "expectations".
I’m all honesty at the moment it’s not I love him but it’s so difficult. I feel like a mum sometimes who wants to sleep with their mum? And it’s way too much for me I’m so overwhelmed all the time at the moment that I’ve started sleeping with a stuffed toy again. I’m struggling to see a future with him I want to think he’ll change. And I’m a highy guilty person so I feel like it’s my fault he’s not happy because I’m not sleeping with him.