Help needed

Hello I  need some help regarding my daughter who is autistic and also has a mild leaning disability with a rare genetic condition as well. She is 11 and has a twin sister, she goes to mainstream school, will be starting secondary in September. We only received the autism diagnosis last year but she is having seriously damaging meltdowns that are going on and on. Today has including smashing china bowels, pulling pictures off the wall, tipping toy boxes, hitting me, destroying the kitchen, throwing my insulin, screaming. I have had to send her sister to a friend for the day, 

My daughter behaves impeccably at school, which I know can be usual but these meltdowns are putting myself, her sister and our dog in real danger (she won’t do it when my husband is at home) I’m worried for the mental health of her twin, I can’t don’t have any family around to help at and I am rock bottom. 

Thank you for reading. 

Parents
  • The following books may be of use to you:

    Managing Meltdowns - Using the S.C.A.R.E.D. Calming Technique With Children and Adults with Autism - Deborah Lipsky, Will Richards (2009)
    ISBN pdf eBook 9781846429170

    Managing Meltdowns and Tantrums on the Autism Spectrum - A Parent and Caregiver's Guide - Jenna Ward-Hawkes, Melissa Rodi (2019)
    No ISBN

    The following book is less useful than the others but is worth a look if you can get it from the library,

    The Red Beast - Controlling Anger in Children With Asperger's Syndrome - K. I. Al-ghani (2008)
    ISBN 9781843109433

    I summarised the key points from it here:

    https://community.autism.org.uk/f/parents-and-carers/32418/am-i-just-doing-everything-wrong/301059#301059

    The key seems to be working out what is causing the meltdowns / tantrums and dealing with them - it seem you have to ride out the tantrums until you can find a healthy way to calm her down. Easy to say and not to do I know.

    I hope something here helps.

Reply
  • The following books may be of use to you:

    Managing Meltdowns - Using the S.C.A.R.E.D. Calming Technique With Children and Adults with Autism - Deborah Lipsky, Will Richards (2009)
    ISBN pdf eBook 9781846429170

    Managing Meltdowns and Tantrums on the Autism Spectrum - A Parent and Caregiver's Guide - Jenna Ward-Hawkes, Melissa Rodi (2019)
    No ISBN

    The following book is less useful than the others but is worth a look if you can get it from the library,

    The Red Beast - Controlling Anger in Children With Asperger's Syndrome - K. I. Al-ghani (2008)
    ISBN 9781843109433

    I summarised the key points from it here:

    https://community.autism.org.uk/f/parents-and-carers/32418/am-i-just-doing-everything-wrong/301059#301059

    The key seems to be working out what is causing the meltdowns / tantrums and dealing with them - it seem you have to ride out the tantrums until you can find a healthy way to calm her down. Easy to say and not to do I know.

    I hope something here helps.

Children