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Secondary education

Lancashire Lass

Hi,

I have 3 children, 10, 7 and 6.  My 7 year old boy has autism.  He was diagnosed early and has had effective intervention, meaning he copes well at primary school with support.  I am hoping he will be statemented next year, as the school has promised to start the process when he is in year 3.

I have started to think about secondary education.  I'm very concerned about this, as I think he could have a very tough time in a mainstream school.  I know he has to learn to get by in the real world, but I think secondary school is a particularly cruel place and I don't know if he needs to go through such an experience to cope with real life.  He is very bright and loves to learn, especially in numeracy and science.  I think a special school for mild learning difficulties could enhance his learning and he would feel safer.

Also, I think it would be unfair on my other 2 children to have the worry of his wellbeing while they are tackling their own issues at secondary school.  I know it's a few years off, but I'm constantly thinking about it.  I don't know if the final choice would even be mine.

I'd love to hear from anyone who has knowledge, experience or advice in this area.  I haven't met another parent of an autistic child and it's been a lonely journey so far.

  •  Primary school were advised by Ed Psych to get me statemented, but never did so.  I had limited support in classroom, which did not really help me and certainly did not attend to my social issues and anxieties.

  • My son has now finished education, achieving a 2:1 in History at De Montfort University at Leicester. It can be done!!

    One of the reasons we encouraged him into further education was to enable him to get a degree and "level the playing field" a bit when it came to him getting a job. In the ensuing years, even non spectrum graduates are finding employment difficult.

    I`m perhaps not the best to ask re the process of statementing, others would be more contemporary. However, I think it depends on your postcode, as this government`s slash and burn policies place the vulnerable in ever more increasing difficulty. Councils can`t/won`t dip into their meagre budgets, and will find any excuse not to statement a child if they can possibly can .  

    Although our children are different ages, we face similar problems, as it`s all down to economics.

    Keep fighting. I know you will.

    Good luck.

  • Hello Lancashire Lass

    I'm sorry we don't have the facility for private messages at the moment and unfortunately we can't allow people to exchange direct contact details on here. We have the rule  in place to protect any of our potentially more vulnerable users - I hope you'll understand.

    I hope you can continue to share ideas here on the community pages or perhaps you might want to look for support groups in your area using the Autism Services Directory - link below: 

    http://www.autism.org.uk/directory.aspx

    Thanks Smile

    Sandra - mod

  • Hi Happy,

    Thanks for your reply.  I feel so much for you.  It's so frustrating when ignorant people don't try to understand people like our sons and think the worst. 

    I'm no further on with Blake, but he goes into year 3 in September.  This was when I was told the statementing process would start.  If he get statemented, I can look into special schools.  If not, my choice is SEN within a state school or paying privately and I don't think we can do this.  I still have concerns about state school, especially after what you have said.

    If he has been diagnosed, I can't understand why the school won't apply for a statement, as it would benifit everyone.

    Whereabouts in Lancashire are you?  We live in Garstang and I work in Preston.  It would be useful to keep in touch.  I hope you make some progress soon.  If you knwo how to send a private message, I'll give you my details.

  • Hi There

    Can I ask how things are going for your son. My boy has recently been diagnosed in Lancashire aged 14! I am determined to have him statemented now but school are being obstructive & I am dependent on them to trigger the statement process. The head senco says they can deal with children within their budget. However my son has fell behind further and further year on year so clearly they cannot meet his needs. Further this same person refuted my concerns that my son may have aspergers or autism stating he was just lazy, manipulative and stubborn... My son is a placid well behaved child who is frustrated and tormented in his environment. 

    Maybe we can share ideas and tips... Do you understand the statement process? 

    Hope things are well 

  • Lancashire Lass

    My son has Aspergers and went through "mainstream" schooling. We had to wait a long time to be statemented and had to poke prod and cajole all the way. Luckily, his peers were pretty good with him, he was accepted as he is, although being good at football helped. Nonetheless, any friends tended to drift away, not prepared to make all the running in a relationship.

    It`ll probably be a bit of a lonely journey, but keep fighting, and get all the advice you can from this site.

    Best of luck.Smile