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Have any parents abandoned religion because of a child with ASD?

Arran

I once encountered a story about a couple who were devout Christians, and also active in preaching Christianity, who ended up having a severely autistic son. This created endless stress and heartache both for himself and his parents. Over time this made them question many aspects of religion. They could accept that God allowed physical disabilities to exist, but had difficulty in accepting how God could allow severe mental health conditions and severe cases of autism to exist. Explanations put forward by church officials were just unconvincing.

As faith and trust in God and Christianity waned the parents turned to studying medicine and genetics. Eventually they abandoned religion altogether and embraced science. They strongly believed that if genes responsible for autism and mental health conditions could be identitied and corrected using gene therapy then it should be carried out. Gene therapy was just the next stage on the road of medicine from organ transplants.

Unfortunately the situation with their son turned so bad it was unbearable. Now a young adult he was severely depressed and hated himself. Following a very difficult mutual decision his life was ended at Dignitas. A blood sample has been saved for use in genetic research in the future.

The parents are now staunch atheists who believe that religious people and organisations opposed to genetic modification of humans are immoral and corrupt when it has the potential to end much human suffering.

Have any parents abandoned religion because of a child with ASD?

  • I turned away from him when my son came to my home and told me He was getting married in a place where I couldnt get to - I am disabled because of very severe abuse in my past which means I am not able to travel far at all. he also told me that I could only see my grand daughter on skype for no reason whatsoever.

    It took me years away from my poor son to realise that my son has aspergers and was doing what his wife wanted him to do and was saying things that his wife wanted him to say to me.

    He had no idea just how much hurt he inflicted on me that day and still doesnt of course.

    We are now in contact thank goodness but it isnt thanks to God at all - its thanks my intelligence in being able to work out just what was happening.

    Now I am grieveing over the loss of the son I thought I had - I have constant flashbacks because of what happened and constant stress because of it.

    So no God - you gave me far too much for me to handle this time. We all have our breaking points dont we - even me.

  • I became a Catholic several years ago. I had always believed in God being able to see me through anything. I never went to church during most of my life because I never felt the need really.

    I am no longer a Catholic - it didnt last long did it?

    I turned away from God - the reasons why are far too numerous for me to list here.

    I thought no matter what I go through I will always have God to turn to - I prayed most nights of my life.

    I am a good person and have always thought that I would be ok no matter what life puts me through. God, if he exists at all had different plans though. He said "right lets test you in a different way this time " he took away my son and my grand daughter for 4 years or so - that did it for me. He gave me more than I could handle when he did that.

    I could always find a good reason for what happened before that - but try as I might I cannot find a reason for breaking up the only decent family I had.

    If God wants me back he will now have understand me.

    I am now attuned to Reiki and am moving towards a more buddhist outlook now.

  • Former Member
    Former Member

    So sad. 

    We belong to an ultra-liberal faith community and expect we will struggle at gatherings now because our setting safe boundaries and routines for SD16 will be labelled controlling. We were already a bit suspect because SD16 has had food issues and we've often gone off site to get food for her to eat.

    Has my faith been tested by any of the diagnostic journey (my first diagnosis was at 14 with dyslexia) with me or my family? Severe bouts of depression challenge it, but I'm a fan of the symbolism of "dark nighttime of the soul" which recognises the empty times as still part of a spiritual journey.

    I've just recently participated in a study on euthanasia in unbearable mental suffering and I'm certain we need to have more conversations about mental health treatments including ECT and trial drugs such as Ketamine for treatment resistant depression.

    On the idea of gene therapy: What if curing depression/autism removes genius? We have a lot of very intelligent people in my family of origin, and they've been successful with recurrent depression. We call it the price of being gifted