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Problem at school, but can't explain...

Saneasever

 Hi. Hoping somebody reading this might be able to help. My daughter (A. 9yrs old, Aspie) has a problem of some description at school. I say 'a problem of some description' because, try as I might, I can't seem to find a way of getting her to find the right words to explain exactly what it is without her getting so anxious that she starts to cry. All I've managed to glean is that it's something to do with a group of children at school, and the problems getting worse (her words). She hates school now (as a result) and will find every cuss word that isn't swearing to vent just how much she hates it, or she'll cry and get herself really worked up. She's never been one to act like this about school, and I don't know what to do to help her. She's only been diagnosed for 5 months, her peer group isn't aware of her diagnosis as yet (she's hoping to tell them at some stage after this half-term with the help of the ASD outreach team). How can I help her if she wants to explain but can't? (Incidentally,(A.) saw me writing this. She wants me to tell you that it's VERY IMPORTANT). I know that she really wants to tell me and get some help, but she just can't. What should I do???

Parents

  • Hello,

    My 7yo often spoke through her soft toys when she was younger, these days she just won't answer/tell you. It may seem a little childish but I would give the puppets a go either as role play what happens at school or to act as a voice for her. Another option is to write some scenarios/keywords out on A5 sheets of paper, or maybe get some pictures/symbols, and get her or a soft toy/puppet to pick/indicate one. 

    I also found my daughter was much more likely to spill the beans, if only a little, when settling down in bed but it was always voluntary, pressure never worked.

     

Reply

  • Hello,

    My 7yo often spoke through her soft toys when she was younger, these days she just won't answer/tell you. It may seem a little childish but I would give the puppets a go either as role play what happens at school or to act as a voice for her. Another option is to write some scenarios/keywords out on A5 sheets of paper, or maybe get some pictures/symbols, and get her or a soft toy/puppet to pick/indicate one. 

    I also found my daughter was much more likely to spill the beans, if only a little, when settling down in bed but it was always voluntary, pressure never worked.

     

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