Could my son have a form of Austim?

Hello all, I'm new here and just looking for some advise really as I suspect my son could have a form of Autism.

My little boy is 3, he is so lovely and the best way I can describe him is quirky.

Firstly he has a speech delay, his vocabulary is good but he can't pronounce words well at all, it causes a lot of stress and frustration and I do my best to understand him but at times it can be so difficult, he has his 3rd speech therapy appointment in July and I have told them my concerns as well and was told he will have an in depth assessment and I'm waiting on a doctors appointment to discuss everything with them as well.

He started nursery recently, he doesn't play with any other children his own age and tbh he has never been very interested in other children, he will say hello and that's as far as it goes, he likes his own bubble but he will happily hover around babies and much older children/adults.

He loves cars, obsessed with them actually and the moon! He does the classical lining his toys up, blocks, stickle bricks anything really but my daughter did that also so I know that can be perfectly normal.

He covers his ears quite often complaint of noise, shouting too loud too loud!, he will become quite hysterical at times and sometimes for no reason at all.

He also thinks everything is a game, he has no sense of danger! He will laugh when fighting with his sister and doesn't understand when he has hurt her and no matter how many times I tell him no or divert his attention away from something he shouldn't do he just carries on trying to do it.

His nursery teachers are wonderful and monitoring him, they have said that the children are unsure of him mainly due to the miscommunication but also as they aren't sure of his temperament as now the excitement of nursery is wearing off his break downs are becoming more frequent.

Also he has no idea of personal space, he will get so close to people but will not like others in his space and often screams at other children if they do try to join in in his games.

He also has a spitting habit which no matter how hard I try I can't seem to get him out of.

He shouts and cries at people in the street when they walk past us, for some reason he really does not like anyone invading our walking space and he also has to be the first one down the stairs, at times I have to grab him of he will try and shove his sister out of the way and then all hell breaks lose and I have to calm him down.

When he is angry he or upset he won't look at people in the eye and rolls his eyes back and side to side, or moves his head sideways and just blinks and refuses to make eye contact.

He is terrified of bugs, a hover fly wouldnt leave him alone when he was playing in the garden at my parents house, I was right by the back door but talking to my sister and all of a sudden he started to sream and it was terrifying! I couldnt comprhend anything and ran over to him only to see how scared he was of this tiny fly, I quickly picked him up and calmed him down, I've been showing him he has nothing to fear and he is slowly getting better, he doesnt scream as often now but he is still very frightened of bugs which I know can be a perfectly normal fear but it more his reaction to them that concens me.

I'm not sure if I'm looking into it all too much, some people have told me yes it sounds plausible and others have said it could be his age but in my gut I know something isn't right and want to do the best I can for him especialy it if does turn out that he is on the spectrum.

Thank you in advance and again sorry for the long post!

Parents
  • Yes I am still with my partner, he is very helpful at calming me down as I do have some difficulties at times but but I've always put it down to ocd/anxiety & depression and never even considered anything else, when my husband first saw certain quirks I have he joked that I'm very weird but he has always been there for me, the only thing that does put a little strain on our relationship is my lack of affection, im not one for physical contact but again that's something that I've never seen as out of the ordinary I just prefer being in my own bubble so to speak. 

    I'm fine most days, I can easily become overwhelmed at times, I just push myself through it and have figured out methods to calm myself down but like I said I always put it down to my anxiety as Ive suffered with it through the majority of my life and once I got out of my teens I started to gain more control over it. 

    When I first started to notice things about my son it was only after my own parents had mentioned their concerns before that I always just said he is like me but since doing research into it and paying closer attention to his behaviour it definitely started to seem he was quite different from his peers but not in a bad way.

    My main concern for him is school, if he is on the spectrum then I feel the sooner we can get a diagnosis the better just so he can have the right support he needs in school as compared to children his age he is still very much a baby with how he acts and requires a lot of patience especially when he becomes overwhelmed, his nursery teachers were at a bit of a loss when he was having a bad day a nursery he just kept becoming quite hysterical but I had discussed all my own thoughts with them though and they managed to calm him down every time, they are also monitoring him themselves and keeping me updated with his behaviour, I was little sad to be told that some of the children are already unsure on how to handle him but he is so happy by himself Im sure he doesn't even notice. 

    I will definitely do all that, thank you so much I was getting so worried that I might have been overthinking or that I won't be taken seriously but I feel a lot better knowing that it is a possibility and can only wait and see where his gp appointment leads now and will discuss everything with them, I've read it can be quite a long process and there catechising lists etc but he doesn't start school until next September so hopefully I will at least know more by then. 

Reply
  • Yes I am still with my partner, he is very helpful at calming me down as I do have some difficulties at times but but I've always put it down to ocd/anxiety & depression and never even considered anything else, when my husband first saw certain quirks I have he joked that I'm very weird but he has always been there for me, the only thing that does put a little strain on our relationship is my lack of affection, im not one for physical contact but again that's something that I've never seen as out of the ordinary I just prefer being in my own bubble so to speak. 

    I'm fine most days, I can easily become overwhelmed at times, I just push myself through it and have figured out methods to calm myself down but like I said I always put it down to my anxiety as Ive suffered with it through the majority of my life and once I got out of my teens I started to gain more control over it. 

    When I first started to notice things about my son it was only after my own parents had mentioned their concerns before that I always just said he is like me but since doing research into it and paying closer attention to his behaviour it definitely started to seem he was quite different from his peers but not in a bad way.

    My main concern for him is school, if he is on the spectrum then I feel the sooner we can get a diagnosis the better just so he can have the right support he needs in school as compared to children his age he is still very much a baby with how he acts and requires a lot of patience especially when he becomes overwhelmed, his nursery teachers were at a bit of a loss when he was having a bad day a nursery he just kept becoming quite hysterical but I had discussed all my own thoughts with them though and they managed to calm him down every time, they are also monitoring him themselves and keeping me updated with his behaviour, I was little sad to be told that some of the children are already unsure on how to handle him but he is so happy by himself Im sure he doesn't even notice. 

    I will definitely do all that, thank you so much I was getting so worried that I might have been overthinking or that I won't be taken seriously but I feel a lot better knowing that it is a possibility and can only wait and see where his gp appointment leads now and will discuss everything with them, I've read it can be quite a long process and there catechising lists etc but he doesn't start school until next September so hopefully I will at least know more by then. 

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