• Replies 7 replies
  • Subscribers 65 subscribers
  • Views 1021 views
  • Users 0 members are here
Options
Related
Hints and tips
  • To quote someone's message, first select/highlight the relevant text, and then use the Quote button that appears
  • To "mention" someone, type @ followed by the start of the forum name, and choose from the list; that person will get a notification of being mentioned

Help! 13 yr old daughter won't go In to school

Loubobsmum

Hi im at the end of my tether and feel like i have no idea about what to do next. My daughter was diagnosed with ASD when she was 10 and it is high functioning so no statement in place as she was coping well at primary school.

It has all hit the fan when she went to senior school and she has become more withfraw and anxious and an angry young lady. She wont go into school anymore as it is overwhelming her and she sticks oit like a sore thumb as she is attending base and not many of her classes. The noose and relationships and constant moving around is too much for her.

Ive spoken to head of SEN and requested that she be assessed by an educational psychologist as i know i need something legal if we want to move schools with special provisions.... however here is my worrying problem.....

Head og SEN says the schhol EP can only assess 3 chikdren at a time so it will be february before she gets to her. Even if she gets a statement they have a 3 year waiting list for a special provision school and have someone who was assessed in year 8 and still waiting in yr 11 for the move so she has told me in not so many words it wont happen! 

I have nowhere else to turn..... she is refusing to go in at all.... surely there is something else i can do?

Any advice would be apreciated.....

Parents

  • I had this difficulty with secondary school myself many years ago now. I had no idea I had Aspergers back then and neither did anyone else (we hadn't even heard of it) 

    After my first school summer break I just couldn't face going back. I couldn't tell anyone how I was feeling and I tried (unsuccessfully) to take an overdose.

    When the day arrived to go back to school I got to the school gate but just could not make myself go through them. I turned around and went back home. I think I was what was classed as a latch-key-kid Back then.

    I was then absent from school for a long time to the point my mum started to get into trouble for it. I learned to go to school then for registration then leave and stay home for the rest of the day. It took quite a long time before any adult realised that this was what I was doing.

    To cut a very long story shorter - I just wish that I had been on the receiving end of some understanding and support back then. I was judged as a juvenile delinquent. My mother believed that I hated her and was deliberately trying to make her life hell! The truth though was quite different. I was a very frightened girl who did not know how to communicate her feelings. I was threatened with borstal which made me even more terrified but that got me no closer to wanting to go to school! I attended very little until the end of school - I left with no qualifications!

    So my advice I guess would be - do whatever it takes to support your child's education. Be patient and polite (schools do have a lot to deal with) but very very persistent at making sure your child gets the help and support they need.

    it would be great if schools could encourage pupils to play a supportive role to fellow pupils with difficulties. 

Reply

  • I had this difficulty with secondary school myself many years ago now. I had no idea I had Aspergers back then and neither did anyone else (we hadn't even heard of it) 

    After my first school summer break I just couldn't face going back. I couldn't tell anyone how I was feeling and I tried (unsuccessfully) to take an overdose.

    When the day arrived to go back to school I got to the school gate but just could not make myself go through them. I turned around and went back home. I think I was what was classed as a latch-key-kid Back then.

    I was then absent from school for a long time to the point my mum started to get into trouble for it. I learned to go to school then for registration then leave and stay home for the rest of the day. It took quite a long time before any adult realised that this was what I was doing.

    To cut a very long story shorter - I just wish that I had been on the receiving end of some understanding and support back then. I was judged as a juvenile delinquent. My mother believed that I hated her and was deliberately trying to make her life hell! The truth though was quite different. I was a very frightened girl who did not know how to communicate her feelings. I was threatened with borstal which made me even more terrified but that got me no closer to wanting to go to school! I attended very little until the end of school - I left with no qualifications!

    So my advice I guess would be - do whatever it takes to support your child's education. Be patient and polite (schools do have a lot to deal with) but very very persistent at making sure your child gets the help and support they need.

    it would be great if schools could encourage pupils to play a supportive role to fellow pupils with difficulties. 

Children
No Data