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Help! 13 yr old daughter won't go In to school

Loubobsmum

Hi im at the end of my tether and feel like i have no idea about what to do next. My daughter was diagnosed with ASD when she was 10 and it is high functioning so no statement in place as she was coping well at primary school.

It has all hit the fan when she went to senior school and she has become more withfraw and anxious and an angry young lady. She wont go into school anymore as it is overwhelming her and she sticks oit like a sore thumb as she is attending base and not many of her classes. The noose and relationships and constant moving around is too much for her.

Ive spoken to head of SEN and requested that she be assessed by an educational psychologist as i know i need something legal if we want to move schools with special provisions.... however here is my worrying problem.....

Head og SEN says the schhol EP can only assess 3 chikdren at a time so it will be february before she gets to her. Even if she gets a statement they have a 3 year waiting list for a special provision school and have someone who was assessed in year 8 and still waiting in yr 11 for the move so she has told me in not so many words it wont happen! 

I have nowhere else to turn..... she is refusing to go in at all.... surely there is something else i can do?

Any advice would be apreciated.....

Parents

  • Agreed, getting a backer is important, and as it is education a local councillor is probably best. Responses from councillors can vary but don't be put off if initially negative, this is help you should expect.

    Tricky bit as ever is how much they, or the people they talk to, know about autism, and to what extent you are left explaining it to them. If the councillor talks to someone in the council's education or related team who thinks they know what autism is and isn't (so many know alls out there - if you cannot see it its not autism brigade), you may find you've got to push harder. Ther local MP is another option.

     I was curious about the significance of PE and Assembly (mumof4boys 772's post). Both environments could present difficulties because of noise and movement. At Assembly everyone is sat together in a large hall, with a sound system that crackles or hums probably, lots of discrete teasing etc. It may be difficult to hear announcements, and mass chair scraping when they have to stand or leave is likely to be mental torture. 

    P E involves getting changed and changing rooms are likely places for bullying, and involve getting undressed in close proximity to others. Gymnasium floors squeak, and things bang, people milling around from all angles is potentially scary.

    Ball games are team building and good for coordination - great start for someone on the spectrum. It may be difficult to register what is going on, and what you are meant to do. If hand eye coordination is poor you quickly get a reputation for being useless with the ball. That means being left out of any teams, and adds to the likelihood of being ribbed.

    Home schooling has been discussed often. It means either paying for a tutor or a parent doing the teaching and therefore not being free to go into work to earn money. Nevertheless a lot of parents have opted for home schooling and have had a struggle to do it.

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  • Agreed, getting a backer is important, and as it is education a local councillor is probably best. Responses from councillors can vary but don't be put off if initially negative, this is help you should expect.

    Tricky bit as ever is how much they, or the people they talk to, know about autism, and to what extent you are left explaining it to them. If the councillor talks to someone in the council's education or related team who thinks they know what autism is and isn't (so many know alls out there - if you cannot see it its not autism brigade), you may find you've got to push harder. Ther local MP is another option.

     I was curious about the significance of PE and Assembly (mumof4boys 772's post). Both environments could present difficulties because of noise and movement. At Assembly everyone is sat together in a large hall, with a sound system that crackles or hums probably, lots of discrete teasing etc. It may be difficult to hear announcements, and mass chair scraping when they have to stand or leave is likely to be mental torture. 

    P E involves getting changed and changing rooms are likely places for bullying, and involve getting undressed in close proximity to others. Gymnasium floors squeak, and things bang, people milling around from all angles is potentially scary.

    Ball games are team building and good for coordination - great start for someone on the spectrum. It may be difficult to register what is going on, and what you are meant to do. If hand eye coordination is poor you quickly get a reputation for being useless with the ball. That means being left out of any teams, and adds to the likelihood of being ribbed.

    Home schooling has been discussed often. It means either paying for a tutor or a parent doing the teaching and therefore not being free to go into work to earn money. Nevertheless a lot of parents have opted for home schooling and have had a struggle to do it.

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