• Replies 13 replies
  • Subscribers 65 subscribers
  • Views 2226 views
  • Users 0 members are here
Options
Related
Hints and tips
  • To quote someone's message, first select/highlight the relevant text, and then use the Quote button that appears
  • To "mention" someone, type @ followed by the start of the forum name, and choose from the list; that person will get a notification of being mentioned

saying No

dolly1

My daughter is 14 years old and has just been diagnosed with ASD and ADHD.  The main thing I am struggling with at the moment is she does not seem to accept the work no.  If she wants to do something/ wants something she has to have it and does not seem to understand why she can't.  Does anyone have similar problems.

Also do local authoritys have specific help they can offer or courses which should be made available to children/parents living with autism as she seems to have the diagnosis but we don't know where to go from here.  She is currently being assessed for an EHC plan

Thank you

Parents

  • I have a son with Aspergers and the only way I dealt with it from an early age was for me to think in advance whether I was going to be able to stick with NO. If I wasn't then I wouldn't say No - if it was important then I never gave in. It did work in the end because when be was about 12-13 he became a very good negotiater and we rarely had the tantrums etc. A lot of it was just that he didn't understand my reasoning. He is grown up now but will still remember incidents which are long forgotten to me and ask me why I didn't let him do a certain thing. Really straightforward rules helped as well. When he was little, instead of having a battle over sweets while out shopping, I made the rule that I bought him sweets on a Friday. He accepted that whereas me randomly letting him have sweets one day and not the next wold have just been confusing.

Reply

  • I have a son with Aspergers and the only way I dealt with it from an early age was for me to think in advance whether I was going to be able to stick with NO. If I wasn't then I wouldn't say No - if it was important then I never gave in. It did work in the end because when be was about 12-13 he became a very good negotiater and we rarely had the tantrums etc. A lot of it was just that he didn't understand my reasoning. He is grown up now but will still remember incidents which are long forgotten to me and ask me why I didn't let him do a certain thing. Really straightforward rules helped as well. When he was little, instead of having a battle over sweets while out shopping, I made the rule that I bought him sweets on a Friday. He accepted that whereas me randomly letting him have sweets one day and not the next wold have just been confusing.

Children
No Data