Please help 11 year old son cant stop crying in class

Hello

 

I am hoping someone can give me some advice.  My 11 year old son has recently started crying in class. He has been assesed by our local lighthouse and has not been classed as having aspergers but does show traits of it.

During primary school he was bullied and did not have any friends.  Since starting Secondary school he has got a nice circle of friends and i thought he was settled.  I have recently been told by a teacher at the school that he has been refusing to work in certain classes and has been becoming very upset and crying.

He has told me that he is getting picked on by a couple of children, which he has built up in his head into a massive issue and this makes him upset before he goes to class.  He says he doesnt want to cry but cant help it at times and cant do the work.

He is a very capable and clever child but gets overwhelmed.  Can anyone suggest some strategies i can give him to stay calm?  The crying is becoming a big issue and i do not want him to become isolated from his peers again.

Parents
  • I know I need to be careful not to keep plugging my perspective which often may not be representative.

    Nevertheless I am wary of the perception that kids on the spectrum are just being oversensitive. They certainly will misread situations because of poor social referencing, but the perception that they are seeing much more in situations than really is there, is something where I'd like to put forward a note of caution.

    If he is "different", I doubt somehow that other kids are trying to have a laugh with him and join him into games. Being different for any reason - overweight, slow, wears thick glasses, or autistic spectrum - usually means you don't get joined into games, or other kids try to have a laugh with a child that is different.

    It isn't easy to determine whether how kids behave when being observed by adults compared to when adults are out of sight.

    My note of caution is, quite simply, that it is more likely they are having a laugh at his expense, and making games around his disadvantage.

Reply
  • I know I need to be careful not to keep plugging my perspective which often may not be representative.

    Nevertheless I am wary of the perception that kids on the spectrum are just being oversensitive. They certainly will misread situations because of poor social referencing, but the perception that they are seeing much more in situations than really is there, is something where I'd like to put forward a note of caution.

    If he is "different", I doubt somehow that other kids are trying to have a laugh with him and join him into games. Being different for any reason - overweight, slow, wears thick glasses, or autistic spectrum - usually means you don't get joined into games, or other kids try to have a laugh with a child that is different.

    It isn't easy to determine whether how kids behave when being observed by adults compared to when adults are out of sight.

    My note of caution is, quite simply, that it is more likely they are having a laugh at his expense, and making games around his disadvantage.

Children
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