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Judgement from other parents

zek1234

Hello New to group but been feeling so isolated needed to know if anyone else has same issues.

My child has had issues since 2 and now 5 and half his peadiatric doctor wishes to start multi agency assessment as suspected now that they have austic spectrum disorder.

This was hard to accept but it would explain the additional needs issues they have been having.

However what I am finding hard to deal with is the judgements from other parents in the playground. 

It started in nursery where I would get snide comments as I went through the gates to dirty looks and tuts as I went past to the point I had to see head teacher to ask for 2 children not to be on class with these children (with the support of their teacher who had observed it) that these children were being told to tell other children not go play with mine.

Things seemed to settle in reception and they did improve greatly but those comments keep coming and now parents who dont even have children in same year as mine getting involved.

An incident happened yesterday due to the school making a major change to routine and they couldn't cope. This meant that they had a meltdown and I had to hold them to stop them running off and hurting self. But all I got was comments of animal and monster to the click gathering for a look.

I came home and was in tears and still trying to calm down from that change to routine and noises (has sensory issues as well)

Does anyone know else have to deal with this and if so how do you get through with it? 

Parents

  • I think also you need to console yourself with the fact that all these other mothers with their notion their kids are smarter may yet learn it is not that easy.

    It is astonishing how many kids 'fall by the wayside' between childhood and adulthood, even in potentially safer 'middle class' communities.

    Of those smart mothers being critical of your child's difficulties coping with a very real disability, some will have children who end of taking drugs, become alcoholics, gamblers, get into crime, develop other conditions affecting success in life etc etc. You wont find a gaggle of mothers outside the school gates tutting at miscreant 18 year olds. They might be tutting out of sight, but the stigma is not the same as the easy disapproval at nursery and primary school.

    You asked about solutions. I think if you explained that autism makes it difficult for children to pick up life skills, besides causing them much stress, you might then ask them if they think they can do anything to help?

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  • I think also you need to console yourself with the fact that all these other mothers with their notion their kids are smarter may yet learn it is not that easy.

    It is astonishing how many kids 'fall by the wayside' between childhood and adulthood, even in potentially safer 'middle class' communities.

    Of those smart mothers being critical of your child's difficulties coping with a very real disability, some will have children who end of taking drugs, become alcoholics, gamblers, get into crime, develop other conditions affecting success in life etc etc. You wont find a gaggle of mothers outside the school gates tutting at miscreant 18 year olds. They might be tutting out of sight, but the stigma is not the same as the easy disapproval at nursery and primary school.

    You asked about solutions. I think if you explained that autism makes it difficult for children to pick up life skills, besides causing them much stress, you might then ask them if they think they can do anything to help?

Children
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