hi all
im new here and hoping for some advice. My daughter is seven and last week finally has the ados assessment and has been diagnosed asd. I always knew in my heart she wasn't quite right and am thankful after all these years we have a diagnoses. However despite having a diagnoses now my partner of three years (not my daughters father) is constantly telling me her behaviour and routines are nothing to do with being asd and she is just a naughty spoilt little girl that I habe brought up wrong. He says I dont siacipline her and let her get away with everything. Where's the line between being naughty and asd ? We are rowing constantly. To top it off my daughter has severe sleep issues she settles to sleep but then is awake every hour crying knocking on doors and cannot settle ahe is very anxious and scared. Her paediatrician has prescribed circadian 2mg which she has taken for a week with no difference at all !!! She wants to be with me. I said to my partner to bring her bed in my room so we can all get some much needed sleep but he said he doesn't want to listen to her noise all night !!! I'm at a loss of what to do regarding it all
. There a lots of posts on here in a similar vein to yours so do have a look + be reassured that you are not doing anything wrong with regard to your daughter's upbringing. It sounds like your partner doesn't want to accept that she is autistic + tht she needs to be parented in a different way to some extent because of that. You must be worn out with lack of sleep + arguing over child rearing. In the end you are her mother + you know best. Don't back down. His attitude to parenting her will make her behaviour/anxiety worse. Routine is v important, daytime, evening + bedtime. You could do pecs so she knows what's happening next during the day so her anxiety might lessen. Knowing well in advance when poss helps. Also you + your partner need the same parenting style or she'll just get confused/anxious etc. He really needs to understand that. Is he open to reading about autism, listening to professionals about it? How is she doing at school - is she getting any support there + how good are the school in relation to her autism? I'm sure others will be along soon to comment. Have faith in yourself, don't be side-tracked by people who don't understand.