Hi,
I would like to recount my son's restraint of another child today and am seeking your views.
1. Some background
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My seven year old son with Asperger's Syndrome is becoming beside himself at school. He has a 20 hour statement and an accurate list of educational needs, about half of which are being fulfilled by his mainstream school.
We have already started the process of applying for a new school we feel will meet his needs better, but events are moving very quickly. His behaviour is escalating, because of his extreme anxiety.
He is running off a lot, and does not go into his designated safe area because it is too public. He runs round the school and staff try and catch him. He tells me they restrain him when they catch him "to make me safe" and "they only hold me by my big bones to avoid hurting my little bones".
He is also restrained when he starts to throw things.
We think he is anxious because he has no safe place and the timetable is flexible at school. He reacts to the vagueness by trying to run the class. He is going home at lunchtime to try and calm down from the insults of the morning but he is stressed again on setting foot in the school.
He was excluded for two days on Thursday for throwing a chair at a member of staff.
2. The incident
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Today we were out at a soft play centre. He was playing nicely with 3 other children but then pinned down the four year old and would not let them get up, leaving the child in tears. When I was able to get DS off the child DS was in tears and terrified of being told off. He said "I was trying to make him safe. I was only holding him by the big bones. Did I do it right Mummy?"
Now all becomes clear. In my little boy's mind, restraint is tied up with being safe, and this is what school has been teaching my sweet, gentle child.
I apologised on behalf of DS and comforted him.
My plan was to ask the Statement Emergency Review to be ASAP and support DS at home as much as possible (flexischooling).
Considering this incident, should I do anything else? Challenge the school over restraint?
