Coping at university - AS son aged 23

I am interested to hear from others about supporting sons/daughters through university.

My son finds the stress of his current (highly academic course/university) too demanding but does not want to change to a less prestigeous university/less demanding course.  He finds it very difficult to focus on the reality of his experiences, and think about changing plans in order to be more likely to succeed.  He has had mentoring help at university but when the chips are down he does not turn up for the mentoring or study support, nor answer the phone or reply to txts from us, his parents. 

He has successfully completed five terms' work over a period of 15 terms, with long periods out due to depression or for breaks as he was behind with the work and not able to cope at the expected level, even with various allowances made.

It is difficult to put the right package of support in place (ie a foolproof one!).

We would like him to transfer to a university that he could attend while living at home, so that we could help him keep in the rails: get up & go to bed at a reasonable time, get to lectures/seminars (or at least not miss them as he had over slepty/not left his room, write the essays, eat, wash, socialise, keep an eye on his mental health/taking medication etc. 

Does anyone else have thoughts, tips or relevant experience?

Parents
  • NAS18241 said:

    Les Worrall, I sympathise with your daughter (and you). Maybe if you told her about me then perhaps she might take it from someone who has been through it that there some things that you can't deal with by yourself, even if you are top of the class academically. Incidentally, do her flatmates actually know she's autistic, or do they simply see her as antisocial? I'm sure my flatmates saw me as antisocial, although no-one ever said as much to my face.

    Thank you for your commenets.

    I can't pass any information on to her, as she gets angry, if she knows I have been talking about her.

    Her flatmates do know that she is Autistic.

Reply
  • NAS18241 said:

    Les Worrall, I sympathise with your daughter (and you). Maybe if you told her about me then perhaps she might take it from someone who has been through it that there some things that you can't deal with by yourself, even if you are top of the class academically. Incidentally, do her flatmates actually know she's autistic, or do they simply see her as antisocial? I'm sure my flatmates saw me as antisocial, although no-one ever said as much to my face.

    Thank you for your commenets.

    I can't pass any information on to her, as she gets angry, if she knows I have been talking about her.

    Her flatmates do know that she is Autistic.

Children
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