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Fed Up!

leanne35

Hi,

I havent been on here for a long while but I'm so done in right now and feel totally alone and isolated.

I have 2 boys with autism aged 9 and 10. They are very verbally and physically aggressive towards me and behave as if they hate me.  They tell me to f off, call me awful names and punch me in the face if they dont get their own way.  We have no help from CAMHS as they have no funding.  They have no respect for me at all and I fear for when they are older. 

My fiance has an autistic son too but he just doesnt seem to understand it from a mothers perspective. I am trynig so hard to take control of the situation and keep things positive but whatever I try backfires.  I see even the smallest of improvements or positive behaviour as achievements whereas he will still point out something negtive they did in the past.

I've been dealing with this for years and I'm mentally drained.  I feel I'm bending over backwards to keep everyone fed, clean, happy in general and yet no one seems to be taking care of me. I've not actually said that out loud as I think it sounds a bit princessy but its how I feel! I love the kids to bits I really do but I have no clue how to end this abuse. Sorry for the little rant, it just helps to know i'm not alone!

Parents

  • hey im Chelsea, mum of 2 with another on the way (yikes) i have a son at almost 3years & a daughter of 9months.

    my son got a probable diagnoses of ASD at 18months and was officialy diagnosed in october 2014.

    lately he appears to be angry all of the time and has started to lash out at me for no apparent reason, ive tried to let it go over my head but its getting me down at the moment. my husband has to respose but he doesnt mean it, he doesnt understand. i know everything hes saying is correct but it just feels as tho he hates me if that makes sense?

    he has porridge for breakfast but lunch and dinner is mash/veg/chicken or fish but it has to be blended if it has lumps he wioll gag and then refuse to eat which can go on for up to 14days. same if theres to much carrott or to much broccolli he refuses to eat it ( i know this is a good diet compared to others) but what really is getting to me is family members saying i have to give him his dinner (food) like any other child of his age and when hes hungry he will eat it!! he doesnt thats the thing ive tried doing that and had no luck whats so ever. he still uses a tommee tippee bottle and i get the same with that. give him a cup he will drink when hes thirsty!! do they not understand that it isnt that simple! do they not understand i have tried all this!! i tell them over and over and all i get is. your his parent he needs to know your the boss??

    my husbands family is the worse for it. where my son is non-verbal and doesnt respond to his name or give eye contact they make comments like hes naughty, he doesnt like his name, hes being rude. how much can you repeat and repeat yourself over and over again before you feel like your gonna snap and throttle them !!! any advice on how to handle in laws?

    some days i feel as though they are ashamed off him. my parents dont understand to much but they try and they see my son regulary ( almost daily) but m husbands parents dont bother with him but when they do come round they are all over my daughter? would it be fair for me to stop contact until they learn to accept him and treat him the same as his younger sister??

    sorry for the rant!

Reply

  • hey im Chelsea, mum of 2 with another on the way (yikes) i have a son at almost 3years & a daughter of 9months.

    my son got a probable diagnoses of ASD at 18months and was officialy diagnosed in october 2014.

    lately he appears to be angry all of the time and has started to lash out at me for no apparent reason, ive tried to let it go over my head but its getting me down at the moment. my husband has to respose but he doesnt mean it, he doesnt understand. i know everything hes saying is correct but it just feels as tho he hates me if that makes sense?

    he has porridge for breakfast but lunch and dinner is mash/veg/chicken or fish but it has to be blended if it has lumps he wioll gag and then refuse to eat which can go on for up to 14days. same if theres to much carrott or to much broccolli he refuses to eat it ( i know this is a good diet compared to others) but what really is getting to me is family members saying i have to give him his dinner (food) like any other child of his age and when hes hungry he will eat it!! he doesnt thats the thing ive tried doing that and had no luck whats so ever. he still uses a tommee tippee bottle and i get the same with that. give him a cup he will drink when hes thirsty!! do they not understand that it isnt that simple! do they not understand i have tried all this!! i tell them over and over and all i get is. your his parent he needs to know your the boss??

    my husbands family is the worse for it. where my son is non-verbal and doesnt respond to his name or give eye contact they make comments like hes naughty, he doesnt like his name, hes being rude. how much can you repeat and repeat yourself over and over again before you feel like your gonna snap and throttle them !!! any advice on how to handle in laws?

    some days i feel as though they are ashamed off him. my parents dont understand to much but they try and they see my son regulary ( almost daily) but m husbands parents dont bother with him but when they do come round they are all over my daughter? would it be fair for me to stop contact until they learn to accept him and treat him the same as his younger sister??

    sorry for the rant!

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