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Late diagnosed autistic ADHD’er seeking support over parenting

russellasmith

Help! I feel stuck and am unsure where to turn.

I am a father to 2 beautiful, amazing boys (one of which has a diagnosis of autism) and I myself was diagnosed with ADHD and autism in 2024. I absolutely worship the ground that my boys walk on and love them to bits, but I never knew just how tough being a parent would be and how overstimulated, overstretched and exhausted I could get.

I had always known that I was a bit different to the norm, but probably spent most of my life trying to keep up, blend in and people please. I went through life carrying such a simplistic view of autism and ADHD, so had no clue that all that time, I was neurodivergent. However, I guess the demands of parenthood have shone a light on my sensory challenges (in addition to some unprocessed trauma) and highlighted just how difficult it really can be - especially when you don’t have the support of family close by.

If anyone else here has faced this too and is happy to help me to access some support to be the best I can be for me and my boys, that’d be really appreciated!

Much love.

R

Parents

  • Dear R,

    Welcome to the online community- it is great to have you here, I am Olivia, one of the online community moderators. Well done for reaching out for support from the online community, it sounds like you are doing a great job as a parent and really want to support your family as best as you can whilst learning to manage sensory challenges and parental pressures. It is really important that your prioritise your own needs- I know this can be very difficult to put into practice, but it can really help improve your own wellbeing as well as making it more easy to manage parental responsibilities.

    It may be worth taking a look at some of the NAS advice and guidance pages:

    About autism

    Masking

    Autism and sensory processing

     The Autism Services Directory can also be a very helpful to finding groups, activities and support that is available in your local community for both you and your children. 

    It may be helpful to work on ways that you can reduce sensory triggers, or creating time where you can have a relaxing sensory break exploring things that may be a pleasant experience rather than overwhelming.

    I wish you and your family a very happy 2026,

    Olivia Mod

Reply

  • Dear R,

    Welcome to the online community- it is great to have you here, I am Olivia, one of the online community moderators. Well done for reaching out for support from the online community, it sounds like you are doing a great job as a parent and really want to support your family as best as you can whilst learning to manage sensory challenges and parental pressures. It is really important that your prioritise your own needs- I know this can be very difficult to put into practice, but it can really help improve your own wellbeing as well as making it more easy to manage parental responsibilities.

    It may be worth taking a look at some of the NAS advice and guidance pages:

    About autism

    Masking

    Autism and sensory processing

     The Autism Services Directory can also be a very helpful to finding groups, activities and support that is available in your local community for both you and your children. 

    It may be helpful to work on ways that you can reduce sensory triggers, or creating time where you can have a relaxing sensory break exploring things that may be a pleasant experience rather than overwhelming.

    I wish you and your family a very happy 2026,

    Olivia Mod

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