Published on 12, July, 2020
My son is 16 next month and i am looking for tips/ advice to promote independence.
I get him to help around the house cook/ clean/ laundry and look after his own personal hygiene. But i think i am still telling him to do things and when to do them.
He has no friends and has always preferred to be on his own, i have tried various groups and am waiting for an assesment for a new one for him to attend.
His mother & i are divorced and i see him 6 nights out of 14 (with him staying over at mine), should i be looking to reduce that and letting him choose when he wants to see me so he's not being treated like a younger child?
Any thoughts please??
Hi, sounds like you're doing ok on a number of fronts + Coogybear makes some vg points. My son's an adult, altho emotionally/mentally, quite a bit younger than that. With prompts at times he does what your son does, ie: housework, personal hygiene. My son values greatly having choices. If he doesn't want to do something/be with somebody, he's aware that usually he doesn't have to. I do think it's important to have a word with your ex before deciding to instigate changes in case there may be problems. I wd think it equally important for her to tell you in advance if she was going to change anything relating to your son.