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Recently diagnosed 11yr old - did you share diagnosis straight away?

FJH2013

Hi,

My son has recently been diagnosed with autism, I’ve not yet shared this diagnosis with him, and am interested to know whether others chose to share their child’s diagnosis with them straight away or if you held off for a while? If so, what were the reasons for this? 

Parents

  • My general opinion on this is the younger the child is, the easier it is for them to get their heads round it and accept so with an 11 year old, I would tell them. If you waited a couple of years he'd have hit the moody teenager stage and it would likely be a harder conversation and you may get the way didn't you tell me backlash.

    I also think at age 11 and (I assume if your from UK) being in high school. It helps if he knows if he needs any additional support, time out etc. He has a better understanding of why and staff can have a more open conversation with him if needed.

    Having said all that, if you felt you needed a couple of weeks to get your head around the diagnosis and work out how you were going to explain it to him the that'd be fair enough. But I'd definitely go with telling him sooner rather than later though. He will remember the assessment so he knows something has happened anyway and I think it's easier to say you know that person you were talking to last week. Rather than remember 2 years ago when you had to speak to that person - probably not.

    That is all just my personal opinion though. You know your son much better than I do.

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  • My general opinion on this is the younger the child is, the easier it is for them to get their heads round it and accept so with an 11 year old, I would tell them. If you waited a couple of years he'd have hit the moody teenager stage and it would likely be a harder conversation and you may get the way didn't you tell me backlash.

    I also think at age 11 and (I assume if your from UK) being in high school. It helps if he knows if he needs any additional support, time out etc. He has a better understanding of why and staff can have a more open conversation with him if needed.

    Having said all that, if you felt you needed a couple of weeks to get your head around the diagnosis and work out how you were going to explain it to him the that'd be fair enough. But I'd definitely go with telling him sooner rather than later though. He will remember the assessment so he knows something has happened anyway and I think it's easier to say you know that person you were talking to last week. Rather than remember 2 years ago when you had to speak to that person - probably not.

    That is all just my personal opinion though. You know your son much better than I do.

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