Son displaying some autistic traits

Both myself and my husband have noticed some things our 6 year old son does that make us feel he may be autistic. He doesn't display the signs listed on the NHS website and wanted to know what other people thought. Does it sound like neurodivergence or normal 6 year old?

Behaviours:

  • Hates change to routine. We have to explain what's happening before it happens and any changes cause him stress
  • Prefers his own company. He is fine with other children at school but likes to play on his own and sometimes hides or clings to me/his dad in public settings like soft play
  • Has had a couple of instances of emotional issues. He has cried uncontrollably and says he doesn't know why. Both in instances of lots of emotions and/or tiredness
  • Intelligent. Uses language and understands concepts other kids his age don't. 
  • Incredible imagination. He makes up complex worlds and scenarios while playing. He also plays a board game once them makes up his own version of the rules which others struggle to follow
  • Teachers say he is very quiet in class but always does his work. He won't talk unless asked.
  • If taken to a new place with strangers he can withdraw, recently this happened at a christening and he said he didn't want other people to see him and he had under a chair for about half an hour before deciding to play with the other kids

Conversely, he doesn't have problems making eye contact or being social but he is usually on the periphery of his friends when they play. He seems to understand emotions in others. 

Any opinions on this are welcome!

  1. Thanks.
Parents
  • Except for the "very quiet in class" bit, that sounds like me (and my daughter) at the same age. He might just be a smart, shy and introverted and not ND at all. He might need a little more time to suss out any new situation to figure out how best to proceed because he's a thinker, rather than a gung-ho doer. A thoughtful little lad.

    Is there any kid who doesn't have "emotional issues" when tired? I'm not sure how good six-year olds are supposed to be at identifying their own emotions, so maybe alexithymia would be a stretch. You could probably continue to support him there and see how it develops.

    A childhood diagnosis of autism would lead you to identify support needs that he might have. But there is no reason why you cannot do some research into autism and support needs yourself and try out a few things. It could be simple things much as you are doing: if he wants to hide under a chair, let him hide under a chair. It doesn't sound like you need to be in a hurry to seek a diagnosis, but you could prepare yourself in advance and you'd be supporting you son either way.

Reply
  • Except for the "very quiet in class" bit, that sounds like me (and my daughter) at the same age. He might just be a smart, shy and introverted and not ND at all. He might need a little more time to suss out any new situation to figure out how best to proceed because he's a thinker, rather than a gung-ho doer. A thoughtful little lad.

    Is there any kid who doesn't have "emotional issues" when tired? I'm not sure how good six-year olds are supposed to be at identifying their own emotions, so maybe alexithymia would be a stretch. You could probably continue to support him there and see how it develops.

    A childhood diagnosis of autism would lead you to identify support needs that he might have. But there is no reason why you cannot do some research into autism and support needs yourself and try out a few things. It could be simple things much as you are doing: if he wants to hide under a chair, let him hide under a chair. It doesn't sound like you need to be in a hurry to seek a diagnosis, but you could prepare yourself in advance and you'd be supporting you son either way.

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