Autistic wife really struggling with mental health

Hi,

I am reaching out as I am lost. My wife is autistic and really struggles with sensory issues. It seems to be getting worse and she constantly tells.me she is trapped. We cannot really move house, as she cannot hold down a job anymore. She is also home educating my 8yr old autistic son. She just burns out at any "little" thing, and it spirals her whole day. She just needs to sleep to escape. It is really difficult and is affecting everyone. She has accessed CBT before and won't consider any more as she deems it a waste of time and not suited to autistic minds. We cannot afford private councilling and she has been to the gp in the past and doesn't feel like she gets anywhere, so won't try again. I am truly lost of how to help, but it is gut wrenching at times, as she cannot find any joy. Does anyone have any strategies that may help, or advise of free services that don't mean a huge waiting list? I really think she needs councilling.

Thanks

Parents
  • It might be worth asking your wife's GP Practice about access to Social Prescribing available in your area.

    https://www.england.nhs.uk/personalisedcare/social-prescribing/

    Things which may help are not always medical / medicinal / formal psychotherapy - so in the meantime while on waiting lists for other services; it can be helpful to explore means of support and connection based on interests in common or acquiring new skills.

    Perhaps you could find out if there is a Recovery College in your area or explore some of the courses via the online version: https://www.recoverycollegeonline.co.uk/

    Try to do some less demanding things outdoors like visit a park or have a picnic.

    Your wife may need to hear her own thoughts and recharge her own energy by regularly having scheduled into each week; some total solo time.

    Maybe it would help your wife to consider joining the community here in her own right.  Perhaps start by just viewing the activity of historical and current posts and replies to see if it might suit her - rather than any pressure to setup an account and participate - until she feels ready.

    I lot of us here share her disappointment and frustration with how CBT / therapy may be conducted around Autistic people.

    There is a book many of us wish we had read before therapy:

    https://www.amazon.co.uk/Autistic-Survival-Guide-Therapy/dp/1839977310

    Also, the National Autistic Society produced a good guide for therapists which might help open the conversation about appropriate reasonable adjustments:

    https://www.autism.org.uk/shop/products/books-and-resources/good-practice-guide

Reply
  • It might be worth asking your wife's GP Practice about access to Social Prescribing available in your area.

    https://www.england.nhs.uk/personalisedcare/social-prescribing/

    Things which may help are not always medical / medicinal / formal psychotherapy - so in the meantime while on waiting lists for other services; it can be helpful to explore means of support and connection based on interests in common or acquiring new skills.

    Perhaps you could find out if there is a Recovery College in your area or explore some of the courses via the online version: https://www.recoverycollegeonline.co.uk/

    Try to do some less demanding things outdoors like visit a park or have a picnic.

    Your wife may need to hear her own thoughts and recharge her own energy by regularly having scheduled into each week; some total solo time.

    Maybe it would help your wife to consider joining the community here in her own right.  Perhaps start by just viewing the activity of historical and current posts and replies to see if it might suit her - rather than any pressure to setup an account and participate - until she feels ready.

    I lot of us here share her disappointment and frustration with how CBT / therapy may be conducted around Autistic people.

    There is a book many of us wish we had read before therapy:

    https://www.amazon.co.uk/Autistic-Survival-Guide-Therapy/dp/1839977310

    Also, the National Autistic Society produced a good guide for therapists which might help open the conversation about appropriate reasonable adjustments:

    https://www.autism.org.uk/shop/products/books-and-resources/good-practice-guide

Children
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