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told off for calming down

Hotel california

Hi again

My son has just told me that his head of year told him off for being in the learning support area during lessons, and if he is in there he must be working.

He has been given permission took go there to calm down when he gets upset, and is therefore in  no fit state to concentrate on work for quite sometime.

He now feels anxious about being in the room in case she tells him off again.

I have considered emailing her to remind her of why he goes there, but welcome your suggestions.

  • When you write your email it may be worth pointing out that the point of having a "safe place" is so that your son can distance himself from the social situations that cause the anxiety, So it doesn't help if that "safe place" is now associated with critisism. I would tend to copy in the head and also the support worker if your son has one.

    Your son does not go there to skive but to be able to return to the classroom in a fit state to continue learning. It may not have crossed thier mind but a willingness to learn is worth far more than many hours of sitting in a classroom with no intention of listening. 

  • This is disgusting.  I have noticed in schools, that staff are either not informed of things like this, or if they are they ignore it and penalise autistic children as if they were NT.  They do not grasp that anxiety is usually a core feature with autism and instead of trying to minimise it they exacerbate it.

    It's like they think autism is an add on, like a cold or something, not that your brain is wired entirely differently.  Shameful.

  • Hi - yes, you shd email her and also copy it to the Head of the School.  This person is clearly not autism aware so your son needs your support and protection.