Published on 12, July, 2020
Can I ask to any parents out there.I find myself so worried about my son it's definitely consuming.I go for runs in the morning for 'me time' but I'm constantly worried about him. He's 8, we have been in and out of A&E for self harm.He has a sister who gets hurt often.I find myself waking in the night now and can't breathe, I wake in such a panic about everything. I just wish it I can help my son, I would sleep or rest rather than worry all the time.We have to do everything all the time exactly so to prevent a meltdown or day of disaster, which is absolutely fine. But quite tiring.Is there any suggestions out there?I'm worried that the lack of sleep and stress is going to be unhelpful for the future, if that makes sense.Thank you x
You need somewhere to let off steam, are there any ASC parenting groups in your area who you could talk to? Or even Mumsnet?
I get why you want to avoid a melt down at all costs, but do you think he could be using the threat of them manipulatively? It gives him a lot of power, what do his doctors say?
I do have friends, I run with and talk to, but no one seems to go through the same thing.
No just things like not opening the car door/ pressing the button for the telly cause complete meltdowns.
Sometimes we just switch on the telly. And this causes the end of the world. (So to speak)
The aggression towards us then means he goes to his safe space, but even hours later, he will use lego or anything to hurt himself with. Or try to touch his light to electrocute himself (in his words) or strangle himself with his door curtains.
I don't think it's to get his way as such, I think everything really needs to be like this ( to open the door/ close it). If that makes sense
It is difficult when people you are are friends with don't get your situation. If you are finding it hard to find any local parent support groups, your son's school may have a list or be able to tell you where to find them. Where I live schools regularly send this information to parents or links on newsletters. You may also find there are specific courses run for parents of neurodiverse children. Other than that your local authority may be able to help.
You mention the difficulty of something changing suddenly, like switching off the TV. I wonder what happens if he is given warning of something or allowed to do the switching/ opening and closing himself so he feels it has been done the way he feels happy with.