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aspergers and gender dysmorphia

markjulips

Hi - I have a 31year old son whom I think may have a mild form Aspergers but has never been diagnosed as it never entered our heads before my neice started having "problems" with her young son and he was diagnosed with autism (which made us do a lot of reading and research with her).  My son has an extremely high IQ and always been good at mathematics and computer programming and has always had obsessions in the past which have always fizzled out when he finds another.  He finds it extremely difficult to make friends, keep a job and has always had relationships with girls but when they end he gets depressed and suicidal.

Last year he revealed he has gender dysmorphia since having counselling sessions after when a psychologist suggested his failed relationships could be because he feels uncomfortable in his male role and I am concerned that this may be yet another obsession which will be irreversible if he does become a woman.  He has now been gioven the go-ahead to take hormones after 4 hours of specialist couselling and 1 seesion with a specialist psychiatrist.

Have any other parents been through this sort of thing or do they think I am just clutching at straws and just watch him go ahead?

Parents

  • I have just read the initial post and some of the responses, and my own experiences are very similar to the original post.  Our son was quiet, could be stubborn, seemed to lack confidence sometimes but could also appear arrogant.  We tried very hard to understand him and would tell him that we were there to listen if anything was bothering him.  He did get obsessive about one interest at a time and he was a diffult child to care for, but we did care, very much.  In very recent years I have seen a lot about autism in the media, and I try to understand as there does seem to be similarities.  I had never heard of it before.  My son grew up in the seventies when we hadn't heard of many things that seem to be so prevalent now.  We took him to the GP whenever we were concerned, and he was offered guidance and counselling, which he attended on his own.  Teachers would complain to us about his behaviour, but no-one ever suggested that there may be a medical problem.  I think autism was more unknown then.

    He falls out with people easily and has not spoken to us for many years, but we heard that he is now living as a woman.  This was a complete shock as he had never shown any signs of this before.

    We have heard some dreadful things that he has said about us, but we can only hope that he is happier now, and more settled in his life.  There does come a time when we have to let them go their own way, but it is very sad that he misses out on so many happy family times.

    I wish you all well, whether a parent, a son or a daughter, and hope that you can all find happiness and peace within yourselves.  Life is so short.

Reply

  • I have just read the initial post and some of the responses, and my own experiences are very similar to the original post.  Our son was quiet, could be stubborn, seemed to lack confidence sometimes but could also appear arrogant.  We tried very hard to understand him and would tell him that we were there to listen if anything was bothering him.  He did get obsessive about one interest at a time and he was a diffult child to care for, but we did care, very much.  In very recent years I have seen a lot about autism in the media, and I try to understand as there does seem to be similarities.  I had never heard of it before.  My son grew up in the seventies when we hadn't heard of many things that seem to be so prevalent now.  We took him to the GP whenever we were concerned, and he was offered guidance and counselling, which he attended on his own.  Teachers would complain to us about his behaviour, but no-one ever suggested that there may be a medical problem.  I think autism was more unknown then.

    He falls out with people easily and has not spoken to us for many years, but we heard that he is now living as a woman.  This was a complete shock as he had never shown any signs of this before.

    We have heard some dreadful things that he has said about us, but we can only hope that he is happier now, and more settled in his life.  There does come a time when we have to let them go their own way, but it is very sad that he misses out on so many happy family times.

    I wish you all well, whether a parent, a son or a daughter, and hope that you can all find happiness and peace within yourselves.  Life is so short.

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